What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple actually got picked.
What is the difference between an orphan and an apple?
Apples get picked.
A farm full of cows were bombed, and only two survived. All of the udders died.
How do you get a cow to eat?
Give it mooshrooms!
Where do cows go to see the big screen? The mooo-vie theater.
What is the difference between a cow and 9/11?
You can’t milk a cow for 15 years.
What did the cow say to the leather chair?
“Hi Mom!”
"We've invented the spade!"
"Oh wow, this is ground-breaking!"
Why was the calf afraid?
Because she was a cow-herd.
What's the difference between a chickpea and a lentil?
I've never had a lentil on my face.
Why did the cow go to outer space?
To see the moooon!
What's an orphan's favorite flower?
Self-raising flour.