Worst Jokes Ever
Want to know why parents don't get school shooting jokes?
Because they are aimed at a younger audience.
What's the difference between drugs and kids?
I don't sell drugs.
Imagine if on April first the government says, "Hahhaha, you all fell for it. Covid-19 is fake; we actually killed all those people, lol."
What is the difference between a rapist and a dictionary?
One of them knows the definition of no.
What is an orphan's favorite beer?
"Fosters."
Why did the boy put a chicken 🐔 in his garden?
He wanted to grow an eggplant. 😂
What do fish take to stay healthy?
Vitamin Sea.
Covid 19 stopped mass shootings faster than the Government.
Kid: "Hey dad, what's dark humor?"
Dad: "Go walk up to that homeless guy and throw a rock at him."
Kid: "But dad, I don't have any legs or arms."
Dad: "Exactly, son."
If a midget walks up to you and tells you your hair smells nice, is that sexual harassment?
Papa John's pizzeria and abortion clinic. You make 'em, we bake 'em.
What do you call an orphan's family reunion? "Me time."
Levon Aronian's wife died in a car crash. That's wheelie unfortunate.
The F in orphan stands for family... oh wait.
You got a black cat.
He was bad luck.
Everyone left you and you committed suicide.
What a CATastrophe!
What do you find up a ghost's nose? A BOOger.
What’s the difference between me and Chester Bennington?
I know how to use an exercise band.
Roses are not always red, Violets are violet, not blue. Irises are never red, Petunias can be kinda blue.
What does this tell us 'cept you can't trust a poet to tell the truth.
I wish my grass was edgy...
then it would cut itself...
Jay and Andrew are best friends who are almost alike. The difference between them both is Jay is poor and well... Andrew, on the other hand, is suck-a-dick poor. Let me explain, Jay wakes up in his room, walks to the kitchen, and asks his mom, Lisa (I call her Lisa now, btw), if there is anything to eat. "No, bitch!" she replies, so Jay drinks a glass of milk and goes back to bed.
Now Andrew... wakes up, jumps out of bed, and he's in the kitchen. He sees his mom fixing some food for work after a long hard night of giving her husband blue balls. "Anything left for me, Mother?" Andrew asks. "Sorry, Honey, I have to eat to put food on the table and to get the running again." *so she goes to work, taking her time* Andrew sits by his bedside and says to himself, "Man... I'd suck a dick for some water right now." *his mom storms back after hearing what he had said* "I'll buy you a soda if you do my first customer for me!"