My friend wasn’t open to the idea of me becoming a nudist.

I told him to stop being so clothes minded

I used to know a guy from a nudist colony

Man, I tell you, nothing looked good on him!

I think the local nudist campground just went out of business.

The sign on their gate says: “Clothed Until Further Notice.”

The Tent Pole Is Up, The Canvas Is Spread, The Hell With Breakfast, Come Back To Bed.

Take The Tent Pole Down, Put The Canvas Away, The Monkey Had A Hemorrhage, No Circus Today

Note to self.

When baking for the holidays don’t Google creampies.

Google cream pie recipes.


The sense or feeling you have dealt with this crap in the past.

Whoever put an s in the word lisp was a jackass

The man walks into a bar reaches into his pocket and pulls out a tiny piano and a tiny piano player the piano player starts playing the piano, the guy next to him asks where did you get that, the man says there is a genie out on the corner granting wishes, so the man sitting next to him jumps up and runs outside he says to the genie I want a million bucks, the genie snaps his fingers and a million ducks appear in the road, the man comes back inside and says hey that genie is a little hard of hearing, the man says well did you really think I’d ask for a 12-in pianist

How do you kill time

Easy taking alarm clock and an assault rifle

Yo sis come here sis: what. Me: oh sorry you doing school sis: yup me can i go sis:no way you’re going to hug me me: i love you

lol 1 week anniversary of me being on Worst Jokes Ever…


A Joking keggar is where i get you drunk with some jokes, only on a special occasion.

Ok, yall ready to get drunk with raging jokes? OK LETS GOOOOo

What do you call an LGBTQ+ disc jockey?

A DG (dee gay)

What does lava use when it can’t walk properly?

A volCANEo

What do crackheads do when a black man got brutalitized?

They start a HIGHot (say it like hiot riot)

What is Satan’s favorite DJ?


What do neck breakers use?


What did Twitter and Reddit eat with chocolate and marshmellows?

Instagraham crackers

Is this the last joke?


What is similar between a dog and my ex?

They are both commonly known as bitches

What number has a flu from a pig?

Nine flu (swine flu)

What did the loaf say when he was playing hide and seek?


Who is the best anime girl?

Well its pretty obvious 02 is on the second rank

Why did Sally get caned?

Because old men hurriCANED.

That was all


Yes, it was (Come back on Halloween for another Joking Keggar)

rocks rock and crack-

What does the beet DJ say when he’s partying?

“Dance to the beet, y’all!”

What do you call a fish with no parents?

An orfin.

Why is a orphan favorite game monopoly? because it can actually buy a house

People say that they miss xxxtentations like the bullet didn’t.

He - I love you Me - I love myself too

Me sees crazy man hit a old poor person me dials 911 police:what is that location me:idk where is dis location police:mission failed we will try again later me:wth police:ends call me:calls hospital hospital:what is that location me:idk where is dis location hospital:mission failed we will try again later me:WTH IS HAPPENDS EVERY TIME NOW EVERYTHING IS ON FIRE hospital:hangs up me:calls fire dEpArTmEnT fire:no fire dEpArTmEnT:what is that location me:hangs up and give up and goes home

Friend: Want to play fall guys?

Friend 2: Yup

Friend: Ok so let me ju- wait where are you going?

Friend 2: I’m gonna jump off

Friend: Why?

Friend 2: We are playing Fall Guys, right?

I adopted u now say goodbye you missed your spanish lesson…