Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

Marriage

Q: Why is marriage not a word?

It's a life sentence!

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  • Difference

    What is the difference between a nun and a hooker?

    One makes you believe in Heaven, the other makes you feel it.

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  • Iraq

    What do you call a terrorist attack in Iraq? A selfie!

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  • Alcohol

    How can you tell if someone Amish is an alcoholic? They keep falling off the wagon.

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  • Exercise

    When should you discourage your husband from exercising and dieting? When he wants to fit in your clothes!

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  • Gay

    Someone told me I looked gay today. I told him that my clothes just came out of the closet this morning.

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  • Mexican

    Why can't you play Uno with a Mexican? Because they'll steal all the green cards.

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  • Lesbian

    My lesbian friends bought me a gold timepiece for my birthday.

    But, I think they got confused when I said, "I wanna watch!"

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  • Difference

    What's the difference between your job and a dead prostitute?

    Your job still sucks!

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  • Marriage

    Why is divorce so expensive?

    Because it's worth it.

    Russian

    Q: What's the difference between a smart Russian and a unicorn?

    A: Nothing, they're both fictional characters.

    Iraq

    What's the fastest way to break up a bingo game in Baghdad?

    You shout out, "B-52!"

    Iraq

    What do you call an Iraqi who owns a camel and a goat?

    Bisexual.

    Penis

    What do you call a dick?

    Suck my dick!

    Lesbian

    Why is it called scissoring and not lip-syncing?

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  • Adolf Hitler

    Why did Adolf Hitler wish he had two nuts?

    Because he only had one.

    Jesus

    Why can't Jesus eat M&Ms?

    They'll fall right through his hands.

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  • Viagra

    We found out my grandpa is addicted to Viagra. No one is taking it harder than my dad.

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  • Orphan

    Why do orphans love a room of mirrors?\n\nBecause they're surrounded by loved ones!

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