Why was the snowman smiling?
Because he saw the snow blower coming down the street.
I just read in the news that tons of Americans are sending their old clothes to poor people in Africa.
Seems like a waste of time in my opinion. I've never seen an African with a 52 inch waist.
Ever tried African food?
Neither have they.
What did the trans woman say after finally telling her parents about her surgeries?
“It felt really good to get that off my chest.”
Why do men give cold women their jackets?
No man wants a blowjob from a woman with chattering teeth.
I met an African girl the other night, we spoke for hours.
We just clicked.
Why do women wear panties with flowers on them?
In loving memory of all the faces that have been buried there.
Surveys show that 80% of women who wear yoga pants never do yoga.
And 100% of men don’t care.
Voting for Hillary because of her political experience is like...
Hiring Hitler as a birthday magician because he made 6,000,000 people disappear.
What's the difference between a casino and a church?
You actually mean it when you pray at a casino.
Jokes are like Indians.
They never die, they just get reincarnated.
Islamic pubs and bars are the worst.
You can't drink alcohol or dance.
Women can get stoned though, no questions asked.
I've decided that from January 1st, I'm only going to watch things that are 4K and above.
It's my New Year's resolution.
When you know that everyone thinks you're a hoe.
WHEN Y'ALL ARE MY HOES!
What did the blind kid say after receiving a cheese grater for Christmas?
"This is the most violent book I’ve ever read."
What did the sushi say to the bee?
Wa sa Bee.
That feeling when elbow surgery was yesterday.
Why did the cellphone get glasses? Because it lost its contacts!
Why should you put an autistic person in a refrigerator?
Because otherwise you’ll get a rotten vegetable.
(Not meant to be triggering).
What does a Jewish man say when he sees a caricature of his face?
"We need to circumcise that one."
