Worst Jokes Ever
When 9/11 happened, we changed our airport policies. When school shootings happen, we haven't changed anything since the shooting at Columbine in 1999. And we say we want the children to be safe.
What kind of motorcycle do women ride? A menstrual cycle.
What kind of bike do women ride?
A menstrual cycle.
USS Liberty. Never forget.
It was bombed and destroyed by the Israeli airforce. Thirty-four dead, 171 wounded. The official story says “accident,” yet an American flag was clearly visible on the ship.
Motive: An attempt to cut off our foreign intelligence on Israel? Blame the bombing on an Arab country?
Just imagine if any other nation bombed an American ship...
What’s the difference between toilet paper and a curtain?
So, it was you....
What do masturbation and brain damage have in common? After a few strokes, there’s no going back.
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan? Apples get picked. Orphans don't.
Why is it so hard to find people defending suicide in any discussion?
Because they are really committed to their cause.
Why was the two-piece swimsuit invented?
To separate the meat section from the dairy section.
How do you know when you're near Wacko Jacko's grave? When 'Thriller' is out and about.
What is the speed limit for sex? 68, because if you go any faster, you’ll have to turn around.
What do masturbation and brain damage have in common? After a few strokes, there’s no going back.
What's a lesbian's favorite candy?
Licorice.
What do you call a blonde girl standing on her hands?
A brunette with bad breath.
Why is reverse cowgirl illegal in Alabama? Because you should never turn your back on family.
What do Rihanna and a DJ have in common?
They know how to get a beat down.
Google 'dancing Israelis'.
How do you flatten curves?
With an abortion.
What's Michael Jackson's favorite thing to do when nobody's home?
Beat it.
What does a one-night stand have in common with earthquakes? You never know how long they'll last.