"Cop: I'm arresting you for downloading the entire Wikipedia." Man: "Wait! I can explain everything!"
I just broke up with my mathematician girlfriend. She was obsessed with an X.
How do you know when a fat person stops eating? You read about it and the obituary
Your mama is so nasty. She showed up to red lobster with her own crabs.
What comes after 69 Period
Whats the difference between a priest and MCDonald's? They both stick their meat in 10 year old buns
Why can’t orphans have phones Because it has a home button
Why are orphans so bad at baseball Because they can’t get a home run
What did the man say in the morning after beating up his wife? I woke up Chris breezy
Id tell a bad baby joke, but I decided to abort
What do you call a A gay Drive-by A fruit roll up
What song do supportive parents of a closeted child love? “The Son Will Come Out Tomorrow.”
Have you ever thought about the fact that every market in Africa is a black market?
What type of tea does the Social Justice Warrior avoid? Reality.
Why can’t orphans have phones Because it has a home button
Why don’t orphans play baseball Because they can’t get a home run
What’s the difference between a crossdresser and a trans person? About 3 years
What’s the difference between a gun and liberals? Guns only have one trigger
Being the first to move in chess. It’s a white privilege.
Straight people ask why gays have such a good fashion sense. They have to come out of the closet sometime
this place is gonna boom in a few days, just like the towers
