When you hear Michael Jackson talk about his "perfect 10," make sure you hide your 10-year-old son.
The time when Michael Jackson came in his pajamas during the trial. Whether or not it was because he saw a 7-year-old boy has yet to be determined.
I asked a black man on the street if a white person paints their face black, it’s considered racist, but if a black person paints their face white, will the cops treat them better?
What do ICE and Mexican drug cartels both have in common?
They both kidnap Canadian women!
The American Dream is real. It's just set and filmed in Toronto and not Texas.
What do you call a fat transgender midget?
Jigglypuff.
Why did the suicidal person cross the road? He was waiting for a car.
It's not rape if you say "April Fools!"
What did the bison say to his son when he left the ranch? Bi-son.
If Canada had to apologise for Bryan Adams on several occasions, it's only fair that Americans are tortured and waterboarded for bringing Katy Perry and Carrie Underwood to the world!
What do you call a fat midget?
Jigglypuff.
What's the difference between Jesus and a picture of Jesus?
It only takes one nail to hang up the picture.
ICE and ISIS have similar first syllables. Coincidence? I think not!
Donald Trump and Fanta both have some things in common.
They are both orange and were conceived from Nazis!
"Captain, captain, there's a man lashed to the mainmast."
"That's your lookout."
Me and bro talking about direct objects at 1 a.m. because we don’t know English.
"Captain, captain, the armadillo has been sighted by the lizard!"
I’d make fun of transgender women, but that’s low hanging fruit.
A priest was driving down the road when a cop pulled him over.
The cop asked him if he had anything to drink. The priest said just water.
The cop said, "Then why can I smell wine?"
The priest said, "Good Lord, it happened again!"
You're really special. But the R in special is silent.
