how is a child with cancer and dark humor similar? They never get old.

How many dead children does it take to change the light in a basement?

More than ten, apparently.

Whats a depressed persons favorite drink Depresso expresso Jk bleach

DON’T READ THIS IF YOU HAVE NOT PLAYED SETTLERS OF CATAN! “Wheat is going on?” I asked my godmother. She replied “Godson, I really don’t know but could you please get me some m-ore Shloer.” “Ok, I’ll sheep if there’s any in the fridge!”

i invited my friend with a vasectomy done for a party. unfortunately he couldnt come.

What is the difference between the snow ❄️ and sun 🌞? Snow is slippery and the other kid 🧒 of weather is not slippery

What time is it when you get home can you walk walk home and walk

What did the sweet potato say to the potato when he was told to hurry?

I yamm

What did the potato say when the sweet potato told by to hurry ?

I yamm

A girl and dog get dropped off at an orphanage why was she crying before she went in Because the people came back for their dog

A man who desperately wanted to be good after serving time in prison was visited by an Angel "You want to change? You can still enter heaven on two conditions …you must bet on the horses with any money you have and pass your winnings to someone less fortunate and you must never hold on to any beef . " The Angel then disappeared.  The man did as was told and became generous and kind …as he emerged from the betting office with all his money… he would pass every penny of it all to a deserving person…each and everytime. He ,however couldn’t seem to avoid meat and would still eat it no matter what .  When he died the Angel came back for him … “But I’m undeserving I can’t come with you” he said … “Yes you can” replied the Angel , “you gave all your stake ( steak) away”

Borders are fat

why did sally drop her ice cream? cause she has no arms

Chris started to tell me a joke about nut, but he couldn’t finish

How did the skeleton know it was gonig to rain, he read the weather forecast you fucking idiot.

How much cum does a gay guy have

An ass loaded

I went up to a priest and asked if he participated in NNN. He replied “How can I, with all these people calling me daddy?”

Teacher: "Kids, what does the chicken give you?" Student: "Meat!" Teacher: "Very good! Now what does the pig give you?" Student: "Bacon!" Teacher: "Great! And what does the fat cow give you?" Student: “Homework!”

A boy and his mother survived a car crash. The boy asks his mother “Was that like how I was born? A hard smash?” The mother replies with “More like an accident.”

So I went out to eat the other day, and the waitress came up to me and asked if I wanted a glass of water. I said “Yes ma’am.” She said “Oh honey, you don’t have to call me ma’am, I’m not that old.” I said “Okay, thanks bitch.”