Worst Jokes Ever
I'm racist.
I don't like green cars.
Orphans might as well join the military or a gang because they have no family.
How To Kill A Blonde 101:
First Step: Get a pool.
Second Step: Put a scratch-and-sniff at the bottom.
Today I asked my best friend what their favorite joke was. They started waving their hands around, and I thought it was a sign to go, thinking I had offended them or something. Turns out they were mute...
A girl kept looking through the window whilst the boys got changed!
I, as a boy, was getting annoyed, so I found an interesting magazine in the corner. So, what did I do? Reload and fire!
I'm gonna make a documentary about meth-addicted prostitutes.
I think I'll call it "Whores on Ice."
I don’t think 9/11 jokes are funny... they just crash and burn.
Do you know what the secret is to have a smoking hot body?
Cremation.
What do you call someone in a wheelchair being pushed by a cannibal?
A to-go order.
Why was the orphan so good at baseball?
Because his coach said, "Go long or go home."
What do you call an annoying emo kid?
A nuisance.
An orphan told me people kept bullying him, so I said, "Tell your parents."
Why don't black lives matter anymore?
Because a harvester is more efficient at picking crops than slaves.
How many brewers does it take to change a light bulb?
About one third less than for a regular bulb.
What do George Floyd and an astronaut have in common?
They both have very little air to breathe.
I don't get why cancer is so hard to beat. My friend's already on stage 4.
Saint Nicholas is the patron saint of working girls. Call girls. Hookers. Prostitutes. And the association is a long one, going back to the very earliest legends which place St. Nick as a Greek bishop in Myra, Lycia in what is now the Turkish Mediterranean - three centuries after Christ.
Saint Nicholas is notable primarily for giving secretly to the poor, and supposedly the first to benefit were three young ladies whose poor father couldn't afford wedding or dowry to marry them off - destining them instead to a life of prostitution. St. Nick supposedly threw a bag of gold through the window to pay for the wedding but, by the third attempt, the poor father was watching to determine the identity of the anonymous benefactor. Santa outsmarted him by dropping the last bag of coins down the chimney.
So, whenever you see Santa, he always travels with his three favourite sex workers - who seemingly never grow old. On a quiet, still Christmas night you can even hear him call them.
Ho! Ho! Ho! And to all a good night.
Q. What do you call a prostitute who asks too many questions?
A. An intrusive thot.
"Sir, we noticed a 2-year gap in your resume."
"That was when I went to Yale."
"A Yale man? Well, you're hired!"
"Thanks! I really need this yob!"
Why is there a big old gay parade on one of the first days of summer?
Pride always cometh before the fall.