I don't like Trump because he has ruined my kind's greatest man, Donald Duck.
I "onerie," or however you spell it, I like to replace all romance or similar memes with duck memes. Just comment duck memes there and change Valentine's Day to Duck Day. Also, for the joke:
Why did the duck walk up to the lemonade stand?
Because he wanted grapes.
Roses are red. Sunflowers are yellow.
Your mom is so fat she looks like a marshmallow.
I met a lovely girl at a friend's house party, so I went and introduced myself by saying I'm Noah, what's yours?
She turned around angrily and offended and said, "I identify as a hockey puck, didn't you see the sign?"
To which I replied, "Bitch, that says hickey puck. If you identify as a hockey puck, then let me hit you!"
Roses are red, violets are blue, I have a Glock aimed at you.
Roses are red, CEO's are white, Patrick Mahomes says, the refs are always right.
I met a lovely girl at a friend's house party, so I went and introduced myself by saying I'm Noah, what's yours?
She turned around angrily and offended and said, "I identify as a hockey puck, didn't you see the sign?"
To which I replied, "Bitch, that says hickey puck. If you identify as a hockey puck, then let me hit you!"
Bro, you can't be talking. You built like Barney the dinosaur. Barney is a dinosaur with dinosaur sensation.
Why is Santa's sack always full?
Because he only comes once a year.
You really put the R in special.
What do lesbians do while having their period?
They finger paint.
Roses are red, the Jews are a cult.
I've practiced Metzitzah b'peh on adults.
Humor is like food, not everybody gets it.
Why do hospitals have air conditioning?
To keep the vegetables cold and fresh.
What did the skeleton get when he saw goth girls?......A boner.
What's black and sits on top of a staircase?
Stephen Hawking's after a house fire.
It insists upon itself, Lois, it insists upon itself.
Juice WRLD really died, then how is he posting videos today?
A woman can fake an orgasm for the sake of a relationship.
A man can fake a relationship for the sake of an orgasm.
A man accidentally elbows a woman's boob as she is standing behind him in a hotel lobby. The man apologizes profusely and says, "If your heart is as soft as your breasts, I know you'll forgive me."
To which the woman replied, "If your dick is as hard as your elbow, I'm in room 318."