Worst Jokes Ever
In school, we learned that squirrels stick their nuts in trees. So, just like my uncle Dave...
Kenny's favorite part of living in his mom's basement is sleeping with the landlady.
Why couldn't Helen Keller eat her Big Mac?
She was too busy trying to read the sesame seeds.
People say killing two birds with one stone is a good thing, but when I did it, people just looked horrified.
Humanity.
When you get a pop-up book of the Qur'an and it just explodes as soon as you turn the page XD.
When you go to an orphanage for a field trip: When the workers said, "I remember you as a kid."
Why do orphans like to go to church?
Because they actually have a father there.
What did the girl with no hands get for her birthday?...
We don't know; she hasn't opened it yet.
What's the difference between an apple and a black man?
Apples look better hanging on a tree.
"You look like you've lost some weight."
"Really? Well, whatever weight I lost, you found it, pal!"
What's the difference between a gay man and a refrigerator?
The fridge don't fart when you take your meat out.
I nailed my sister's... picture on the wall.
You dirty-minded bastard!
Why can orphans never be kidnapped?
No one can tell them that "your parents said that they would be delayed and I was told to pick you up."
What's Michael Jackson's favorite hobby?
Nothing because he's dead.
What do babies and grenades have in common? They both make noise when you throw them.
Dating a stripper is like eating a bag of chips in class.
Everyone looks at you in disgust, but deep down inside they want some too.
What did the lady say to Michael Jackson at the beach?
"Excuse me, you're in my sun (son)."
There was once a man from Peru. Who fell asleep in a canoe. While dreaming of Venus, He played with his penis, And awoke with a hand full of goo.
It's better to cum in the sink than to sink in the cum.