How do rappers stay cool during summer?
They throw SHADE.
How do rappers stay cool during summer?
They throw SHADE.
Me: Brings in missing child.
Police: OMG this kid has been missing for 3 months. Here is your reward.
Me: Oh, cool.
NEXT DAY
Me: Brings in 8 other kids.
Police :0 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
John pretended to be a doctor.
Motu came to him. He said, "I lost my hunger."
John brought some samosas for his lunch. Motu ate them. John said, "Your hunger is back!"
Then, Motu said, "I lost my taste."
John said, "Number 1, bring some water." Motu drank it and said, "This is petrol!" John said, "Your taste is back!"
Motu said, "I lost my memory."
John said, "Number 1, bring some medicine." Motu said, "But Number 1 brought water." John said, "Your memory is back!"
Wade likes Luiz!
Steven Hawking had dark humor.
Whenever he turned on his laugh effect, it diverted power from his screen brightness.
Yo mama is so fat, she doesn't need internet, she's already WORLDWIDE.
How many push-ups can Chuck Norris do?
All of them.
Chuck Norris can drown a fish.
Jokes about communism aren't funny unless everyone gets them.
I never forget my grandpa's last words.
"Are you still holding the ladder?"
Why download Fruit Ninja when you have your arm?
What do you call a black goldfish? A gigger.
Why did the short person bring a ladder to the bar?
Because they heard the drinks were on the house!
Why did the short person become a chef?
Because they could "microwave" dinner without needing a stool!
Why did the skydiver's parachute fail?
Because it realized it had a better chance of survival without them.
Why did the skydiver's parachute fail?
Because it was made by the same company that made their life decisions.
Why did the skydiver bring a backup parachute?
In case the first one wanted to "cut ties" with them mid-air.
Why did the parachute refuse to open?
Because it had a "fatal attraction" to the ground.
Why did the parachute break up with the skydiver?
Because it was tired of being taken for granted every time things fell apart.
"Why don't skeletons go skydiving?"
"Because they don't have the guts... or the parachute!"