Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

When your mom tries to hit you with the belt but misses and hits herself... #victoryroyale

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    • I don’t know what’s worse: Finding bucket loads of porn on my dad’s laptop, or finding out he was in all of them.

    What do lesbians do when they have a problem? They finger it out.

    I bought a new shotgun the other day. Want to know what I called it?

    Kurt Cobain's microphone.

    Three women were in heaven. The angel at the gates said, "How good the ride into heaven is for you, is determined by your commitment to your most recent partner."

    The first lady says, "2 years, 2 side-hoes." She got an old lexus.

    The second lady says, "10 years, 1 visit from a prostitute." She got a Mercedes-Benz.

    The third lady says, "I never had a husband."

    The angel says in response, "F*ck me and then you can have a lambo."

    They all arrive in heaven, to see the second lady crying.

    The first lady says, "I know we are dead, but it could be a lot worse."

    "How!?" The third lady cries, "The angel has a flute for a d*ck!"

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    • I remember the first time I went to one of Luis Fonsi's concerts...

    I wanted to commit DEATHpacito so badly.

    The other day, I donated my car keys, $1,000, and a passport to a homeless man.

    You could feel the happiness come from me after he holstered his suppressed shotgun.

    My wife asked me to help cure her from sucking her thumb. So I drew a cock on it.

    What's the difference between McDonald's and a priest?

    Nothing... They both stick their meat in ten-year-old buns.