Worst Jokes Ever

Michael doesn’t fart. Jackson does.

What category of music did JFK like?

You could say he was a metalhead.

Doctor: I diagnose you with obesity.

Patient: It runs in the family.

Doctor: Nothing can run in your family.

What do you do when you get locked outside your house? You talk to the lock, because communication is key.

Why does no one look up at Steven Hawking?

You have to look down to see him.

To everyone saying, "Don't joke about suicide, it's not even funny to laugh about people dying." Do you think we have it easy? Have you ever thought these jokes were helping us to cope? Mind your own business and don't make assumptions on people you know nothing about, please and thanks.

Have you heard of the current event in Africa? It’s called the Hunger Games.

Why was the ant so confused? Because all his uncles were ants.

Bf: What do you think about our love?

Gf: Count the stars in the sky.

Bf: Aww, it's infinity.

Gf: Nope, just a waste of time.

Atoms never touch, so it means, we haven't touched each other or anything. So, sir, I did not drop-kick that child.

Incest. A game the whole family can play.

Scrolled through all of them, still haven't laughed.

What do a bullet and a police officer have in common?

When a bullet kills someone, it gets fired.

Why did the dog go into the fire?

Because it wanted to be a hot dog!

Why do dwarfs laugh when they run?

The grass tickles their balls.

What do you call me?

Chinese?

Marcus is gay.

370HSSV 0773H wait, you're reading it upside down.

This morning I woke up, then took a bath with some chocolate mud. At first, when I turned the damn flossers on, I noticed it wasn't water. It was all chocolate mud, and now my body is all chocolatey.

Yo mama's so ugly, she threw a boomerang and it refused to come back.