Worst Jokes Ever
What is the name of Hellen Keller's dog?
NYAHHH NYAHH NYUUUU NYAAHHHAADUUDU!
What is the difference between Putin and Hitler? Putin no longer supplies gas and Hitler gives it away for free.
What was the most useful tool in the 17th century?
Slaves.
Mate, my wife Susan has kicked me out again, anyone got a lift?
How do you call an iPhone cover in Germany?
An apple bag. 😜
What does Johnny Depp hate about driving a car?
He can't drink and drive.
Scammers got relegated! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Roses are red, violets are blue, a face like yours belongs in a place worse than a zoo.
What has 182 teeth and holds back a monster?
My zipper.
Q: Why are lesbians bad at math?
A: Because they can't multiply.
God: You're gonna have 2 parents.
Orphan: Double it and give it to the next person.
"Officer, don’t arrest me, she said she was 5 in dog years!"
Are you gay? Yeah, because I loved you.
Why can't an orphan play baseball?
Because they can't get a home run.
What did they call Hitler when he swam?
Adolfin.
Whoever kills Hitler goes to heaven.
Oh, wait... never mind...
I was watching The Conjuring with an emo person. She said she likes the part where the girl was hanging. I said, "Why? Because you wish it were you?"
What do you call a terrorist at a cinema?
A box office bomb.
I will never forget my grandpa's last words:
"What the fuck is in this drink?"
I walked into a supermarket to get some ordinary clothes for the wife. Then I realized I was in a rape museum.