Whould jokes
Why did Hellen Keller's dog run away?
I'm sure you would run away if your name was kjdhfkuaysbgfbkuejgf.
If the captain of the Titanic was dumb, he would eat the iceberg.
You know how girls say, "I would have sex with you if you were the last person on earth"? Well, who's gonna stop me?
What can you say both at a funeral and during sex?
This would be much better if you were alive.