Vasicek jokes
I want to make another joke about Josef Vasicek, but I think if I make the NHL, I'll die in an airplane crash, so I won't risk it again.
Why was Josef Vasicek a Stanley Cup champion in 2006?
Because you know who was jealous and he went down in 2020.
What did Josef Vasicek think before the plane hit the ground?
"Oh shit, is my name still on the Stanley Cup?"
What do you call someone who is in an airplane crash who was a 2006 Stanley Cup champion with the Carolina Hurricanes?
Josef Vasicek.
What's the difference between the 44 out of the 45 people who died in the Yaroslavl crash and the nine people who died in the helicopter crash?
Only one was ever famous. Vasicek and Kobe Bryant were the champions.
I can measure the speed of an object, because I want to km/s.
How many times does 43 go into 8?
Get in the van and find out.
How many times can 50 fit into 9?
Get in a van and find out.
Why do Priests like playing the violin? They get to finger A minor.
I like my lovers like I like my whiskey, 12 years old and mixed up with coke.