Twos jokes

Two boys were at a lake, and they went to a bush and saw a naked lady.

One ran away, the other one followed the one who ran and asked why he ran. The boy answered, "My mum told me if I saw a naked lady I would turn to stone. I ran away because I felt something get hard."

I don't see why people these days choose their gender. There's only two, it's Nerf or nothing! (I'm just joking, I honestly don't care.)

1+1? Too hard.

A farm full of cows were bombed, and only two survived. All of the udders died.

Two kids were beating up a ginger kid in an ally, so I stepped into help. He didn’t stand a chance against the three of us.

What part of "Another One Bites the Dust" do you sing to a disabled person to make fun of them? "I'm standing on my own two feet."

I can swallow two pieces of string and when they come out the other end, they'll be tied together. I shit you knot.

Did you hear about the two thieves who stole a calendar? They each got six months.

Two guys were beating up someone in an alley, so I stepped in to help.

He didn't stand a chance against the three of us.

I got a new Lego airplane set from my friend... oddly, there were also two towers included in the box as well.

Did you know that in 2001 there was an Among Us game, except that it was on a plane and had two imposters.

What do genders and the Twin Towers have in common?

There used to be two, now it’s a sensitive subject.

I told an orphan to never stop talking until their parents come home.

Now I can’t get it to shut up.

What do you call two Mexicans playing ping pong? Juan on Juan.

What do you call a white man sandwiched between two black men in a blue sleeping bag?

An Oreo.

Two friends were walking in a forest. They started to fight.

A cannibal came and shouted, "Food fight!"

Why did two fours skip lunch? They already ate.

Two cunts are better than one, but one cunt is better than none.

If your corona test shows two lines, is that then positive or negative?

What do you call two natives in a sleeping bag?

Twix.