Train jokes

My crush rejected me 2 years ago, and I still have never moved on. I'll be over her when a train is over me.

Them: What's on your arm?

Me: I'm training to breathe fire ;)

What's white, yellow and goes 40 mph?

A train driver's egg sandwich.

I was spending my holiday in Paris with my gf. As we were walking near the city, a meteor hit and killed my gf.

Forensics did an autopsy on the corpse and concluded that someone missed a pen and hit my gf from the PSG training ground. SHAME ON YOU PESSI FOR RUINING MY LIFE! 🤬😡

You're the type of guy to have a whole training arc after a girl wants to fight you.

So, a man finds a woman on a train track while he's on his way to a bar, and they had a lot of sex.

When he gets to the bar, he brags about the different sex positions they used, and one of the guys says, "Oh, did you do head?"

He responded with, "No, I couldn't find the head."

Yo mama so fat, I have to take a train, 2 buses, and 3 airplanes to get on her good side.

Ex Of Johnnys: I have a question.

Johnny: What?

Ex Of Johnnys: Am I pretty?

Johnny: Yes ofc jesus made everybody wonderfully!

Ex: Awhh!

Johnny: But whoever made you was painting Thomas the Train while making your face.

I was on the train today and saw a cow on it.

It was quite strange until I realized it was Alfie's mum.

The first trains were often derailed. They had a bad track record.

Three blondes were taking a walk when they stumbled on some tracks. They argued on what the tracks came from. One of them said, "it's a deer." The other said, "No it's a coyote." The last one was going to give her thoughts, but that was when the train hit them.

Why did Timmy drop his ice cream cone?

He got hit by a train.

A man and a cow are stuck on train tracks, and there is a train in the distance about to hit both of them. A vegan sees this and tries to help. Who does he save, the man or the cow?

Neither. He isn't strong enough to lift either of them.