The jokes
Why did Stephen Hawking go to hell?
Because he couldn’t climb up the stairs to heaven.
What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Farrah Fawcett? Six hours.
what came first, The apple or the girl? The apple, because the tree left her hanging :)
Why is it annoying to eat by basketball players? Because they dribble all the time!
What’s the speed limit in bed?
It’s 68. Once you hit 69, you have to turn back around.
Memes
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple gets picked.
Why can't an orphan watch the movie:
It was family rated.
A kid asks his dad why his name is Experience. The dad says, "That's what we give our mistakes."
I am the grand wizard, mak.
Wanna hear a joke about the Flash?
"Never mind, it's too fast."
When rejected:
That's ok, the 3 other little pigs said no, too.
What is the difference between apples and orphans? Apples get picked!
Me dozing off while driving.
Everyone else on the passenger plane: September 11, 2001.
Why did the orphan commit crimes? To know what it's like to be wanted.
What do you call a cow in the snow?
Chilli Beef.
Why did the suicidal man walk in front of the car? To get to the other side.
Q: Why did the cat get arrested?
A: He was caught littering.
Q: Why did the cat get a ticket?
A: He was caught littering.
Q. What's the most musical bone?
A. The trom-bone!
What's got 5 arms, 3 legs, and 2 feet? The finish line at the Boston Marathon.
What did the boy with no hands get for Christmas? Gloves! Nah, just kidding... He still hasn't unwrapped his present.