The jokes
Today, I saw my friend go crazy eating her ham sandwich. When she went to the bathroom, I checked inside her ham sandwich, and there were fresh drugs.
"I'm afraid for the calendar. Its days are numbered!"
The plane said to the tower, "You're so cute, I want to come crashing into your arms!"
What's the similarity between an orphan and my dick?
They both will die alone.
Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall. Humpty Dumpty had a great fall. All the kings horses and all the kings men, said "Fuck him, he's only an egg."
Memes
Why did the orphan not call 911 when he saw a tower catch fire?
'Cause he did not want any kids to go through the same pain.
Are you the Twin Towers? Because you made my heart explode.
What did the orphan poker player say to the elder?
“Will you raise me?”
Jesus is the worst, just joking; he is the best! Best best BFF great guy ever that has a miracle. Jesus comes from Bethlehem! 😄😄😄😄😄😄😄😄😇
Yo mama's so stupid, when thieves broke into her house and stole the TV, she chased after them shouting, "Wait, you forgot the remote!"
Yo mama's so stupid, she got locked in the grocery store and starved to death.
Beauty is only skin deep... but ugly goes all the way to the bone!
You are so ugly, when you looked in the mirror your reflection walked away.
Santa's sack is big because he only comes once a year, but his sack is SO BIG after containing the lovely eggnog he has that those weigh the sleigh.
He never had kids because he comes in the chimney.
Why are the Twin Towers mad?
They are like pepperoni and cheese as a plane.
Why do orphans love chips? They love the family-sized ones, too!
What Lord of the Rings book is banned from the United States?
The Two Towers.
A priest, a rabbi, and a vicar walk into a bar. The barman says, “Is this some kind of joke?”
Two antennas met on a roof and got married.
The ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was incredible.
OK, OK, what's up with the fake Gwens? I am going to use a test to see who is real or not.
The real Gwen will know this. When did I come onto this website? Next question, what is my real name, and do I go on cursing rampages? Only the real Gwen can complete this test with the right answers.