The jokes

My father, who flew the plane, couldn't have a funeral, he went everywhere.

Your mother's hairline is sooooooo long cause Dora the Explorer could not explore it.

Yo mama so fat, when she jumped in the ocean, the whales said, "We are family, even though you're fatter than me!"

It looks like Kevin Magnussen finally got pole position.

He has the bragging rights that he took over Russia now.

What did the Turkey say to the other Turkey?

"They forgot the stuffing!"

What did the fat guy say to the tree?

"Get me some coconuts!"

I stood on the edge of a building and someone yelled, "Do a flip!"..... and I did.

Why did the Dinosaur cross the road?

'Cause the Chicken wasn't born yet.

I'm such a good babysitter because the last person I babysat was so flat.

Bro, the Twin Towers are like my grandpa and his friends. One survived—my grandpa. The others have fallen—his friends.

What's the smartest insect? A spelling bee!

Your mum's hairline was so big that Dora the Explorer could not find it.

What is the difference between a suicidal person and you?

None, you are both dead on the inside. Lol.

What’s an emo's favorite game?

The emo within.

I am sure this was the type of economy Judas Iscariot was in when he betrayed Jesus.

What do you call a group of emos? The suicide squad.

I saw a helicopter fly. Next minute, I knew Kobe was on the news.

I saw a girl crying. I told her, "Where are your parents?" She cried more after that. I got kicked out of the orphanage.

Two scientists walk into a bar. The first one says: "I'll have some H2O."

The second one says: "I'll have some H2O, too." And then he died.

The cure for depression is around the corner... There it is, the train.