Teeny jokes
A pedophile was holding a bag of chocolates and then approached a little girl at the park.
"Hey little girl! If you give me a teeny-tiny kissy-kiss on the tip of my wee-wee, I'll give you a piece of my chocolate!"
The little girl replies, "If I suck your whole cock, can I have the whole bag?"
Lol, I have a teeny black dick.
"(live comedy club) Foul Mouthed Trump Hating Comic:
......"Hey how 'bout that Donald Trump chump, what the fuck up with that dude, man? Geeeezus, he got some kuh-razy ass shit spewing endlessly out that pie-hole, 24/8!" (< leap week, muthafukas!) . . . "I mean, even his last name rhymes with shit that's synonymous for being fucked up, for instance"....
STUMP: TEENY DICK
BUMP: TINY TIT
GUMP: DIMWITTED MOVIE IDIOT GUY
MUMP: A FUCKED UP CHILDREN'S DISEASE
LUMP: IF IT'S MALIGNANT, YOU'RE KINDA FUCKED
UMP: OFTEN MAKES TERRIBLE CALLS
RUMP: AN ASS
DUMP: A PILE OF SHIT THAT CAME OUT OF AN ASS
HUMP: SOMETHING DADDY DID TO HIM DAILY THROUGHOUT CHILDHOOD
PUMP: SEE "HUMP" . . . and last, but definitely not least --
JUMP: JUMP INTO A DEEP HOLE MOTHER FUCKER, AND GO TO HELL!!
.... "Well that's about it for me as my explosive diarrhea is about ready to take a turn for the worse!! ......(splort!, plop!)....... OOOOPS!! ..... sniff, sniff........ Ewww!" (audience roars) "Fuhhhhk!". . . I better go, 'cause I just went!! ..... Ha! ha! ha!" . . . "Thank You Lazies and Gerbilmen! Good Night!!" ............
(endless laughter, guffaws, cheers, jeers, queers, beers, pants pee-ing, beaters beating, pepper sprayin', guns poppin')
"OH LORDY!!... HELL HATH FINALLY COMETH, AND ARMAGETTIN' THE FUCK OUTTA HEEE!!"
(quick curtain call, and off to waiting taxi.........with the windows down) .......Amen."
(pre-election 2016) Trump Hating Comedian at seedy East L.A. comedy club -
"Hey how 'bout that Donald Trump chump... what the fuck up with that dude, man?
"Geeeezus, he got some kuh-razy ass shit spewing endlessly out that pie-hole, 24/8!" (< leap week, muthafukas!)
. . . "I mean, even his last name rhymes with shit that's synonymous for bein' fucked up, for instance ....
STUMP: TEENY DICK
BUMP: TINY TIT
GUMP: DIMWITTED MOVIE IDIOT GUY
MUMP: A FUCKED UP CHILDREN'S DISEASE
LUMP: IF IT'S MALIGNANT, YOU'RE KINDA FUCKED
UMP: OFTEN MAKES TERRIBLE CALLS
RUMP: AN ASS
DUMP: A PILE OF SHIT THAT CAME OUT OF AN ASS
HUMP: SOMETHING DADDY DID TO HIM DAILY THROUGHOUT CHILDHOOD
PUMP: SEE "HUMP"
. . . and last, but definitely not least --
JUMP: JUMP INTO A DEEP VAT 'O SCAT MOTHER FUCKER, AND GO STRAIGHT TO HELL BITCH!! ....
HA! HA! HA! HA! YESSS!!
.... well boys and girls, that's gonna be about it for me, as I think my explosive diarrhea is about ready to take a big turn for the worse!"
......(splort!, plop!, drip!)........ OOOOPS! 'snif, snif'........
..... ewwwwww!!
(audience growing uneasy and unruly)
"Fuhhk! ... I better go now, 'cause I just went! ... ha! ha! ha! ...... Yikes!!
GOOD NIGHT LAZIES, AND GERBILMEN! PLEASE DRIVE RECKLESSLY!
(curtain drops)
(continuous laughter, guffaws, cheers, jeers, queers, beers, pants peeing, beaters beating, pepper sprayin', fists fuckin', guns poppin', blood pumpin')
"OH LORDY!!... I THINK HELL HATH FINALLY COMETH,
... AND ARMAGITTIN' THE FUCK OUTTA HEEE!!"
(one very quick curtain call, and swiftly out the back door to an awaiting taxi ............ with ALL the windows rolled down) Whew! ............ Amen.
Bro, Asian girls have the weirdest names. I was, like, with one, and she kept on saying, "I'm too young."
Little Johnny went on a camping trip. All the tents were taken, so he shared with the teacher. So Little Johnny says: "Can I play with your bellybutton? My mom always lets me when we camp." So the teacher says: "Sure." 5 minutes later the teacher says: "Woah, woah, woah that's not my bellybutton!" Little Johnny says: "Woah, woah, woah, that's not my finger."
Average Kid: brings mp3 to school.
Rich Kid: Brings mp4 to school.
Quiet Kid: Brings an mp5.
When a midget smokes weed, do they get high or medium?
What do you call two transgender midgets having sex?
A microtransaction.