SOS jokes

Your mom's so fat, she fell.

You're so skinny when you lift up weights, you fall through your asshole.

Your mum is so fat, when the doctors did her x-ray, the doctor said to her, "I want your x-ray, not an elephant's x-ray!"

Your mama is so old, she made a book bigger than the Bible about her life.

Okay, so I have a dairy and sugar allergy, and if I eat it, I get REALLY CONSTIPATED, so this is me when I’m constipated ᕙ(⇀‸↼‵‵)ᕗ lol.

Yo mama is so fat, she jumped on a trampoline and she broke it.

Yo mama is so pretty, she could get in a car crash because boys are staring at her.

You're so bent and ugly that you'd make Elton John go straight!

Me: I wouldn’t want to be with a shitmate.

Shitmate: You’re so shitable.

Me: Bring banana ice cream.

Shitmate: Never happening.

Why are Spider-Man and an orphan so similar?

They both have "No Way Home."

Yo mama so fat, she fell over. Nobody laughed, but the ground cracked up.

Your hairline is so big, it counts as its own planet.

You're so fat, when you went on the weighing scale, it said "to be continued."

Why do orphans like baseball so they can know what a real home is?

This joke is so bad I don't even know what I wrote at this point.

Why is your hairline so put back it's looking like it was slapped by Will Smith and it needs to be fixed?

I got hired by an orphan to commit crimes, so he could become wanted.

My country is so corrupt that it voted me as the most sexiest man.

Victory assured, I will continue like that till I'm six feet under.

Your mama is so fat, when she farted, the world had to wear gas masks.

Me: Can you give me some drumsticks to eat?

Brother: Why though?

Me: So I can just drum up an appetite.