SOS jokes

When you send a dick pic and she sends one back,

I'm glad mine is the biggest, so I get to fuck my dad again.

Why don’t coffins have Wi-Fi?

Because they don’t want people to be so ‘connected’ while they’re trying to rest in peace.

Yo mama is so stupid that she thinks fruit punch is a gay boxer!

You're so bald, United Airlines has asked for permission to land.

Your dick is so small they thought you were a girl when you came into the world.

What would a man say to flirt with a woman that has a big butt?

You are so butty-ful!

So I guess Ice Cube was right, Eazy's dick smelling like MC Ren's shit, and Eazy died of AIDS.

Your mama so white that her first number was 911.

My dad told me Santa was black, so instead of cookies and milk waiting for him when he came down the chimney, he got cornbread and purple Kool-Aid.

I'm so proud of my grandpa, he killed Hitler. WAIT-

Name one person who would take an orphan?

Michael Jackson, so they can play all night.

My friend that was in a wheelchair was getting bullied, so I said, "Stand up for yourself."

Yo hairline so long that it doesn't have a stopping point.

Why did they make bus stops? So the bus driver would know where to pick the orphan up.

I have a friend who recently stopped smoking, and the withdrawal was causing hallucination. He went to my house and thought there was a shark in the pond in my backyard. So, I would like to dedicate these lyrics to my friend: "I see a dreamer over there by the water!"

Yo mama so fat she can't walk for five seconds without sweating, causing a tsunami!

🌍: You're so hot!

🌎: How are you single?

☀️: I burn anyone who gets too close!

Me on my way to the principal's office after the trans kid told me to act my age, so I told him to act his gender.

I remember having a crush on my math teacher, so I winked at her and said, "Don't worry, babe, I'll call you later."

Yo mama is so dumb, she sits on Trump's wall 24 hours every day.