Man: Hey Siri!
Siri: Yes?
Man: I'm desperate, will you marry me?
Siri: Uh...
*phone literally explodes*
The orphanage was open in apps, but I didn’t see the home button.
When you’re hiding from the school shooter next to people who made fun of you for having an Android: “HEY SIRI”
Why does an orphan only have a Samsung? Because it doesn't have a home button!
"Hey, you! Why are you so serious?"
Q. What's the difference between my phone battery and an anti-vax kid?
A. Nothing, they both die at ten.
Why do orphans use iPhone X's?
Because they can't find home.
An orphan made an Instagram. He did not know what that symbol was on the bottom left hand corner.
Why is the iPhone 7 not a smartphone?
It doesn't know jack.
Why is an iPhone X perfect for an orphan? Because it doesn't have a home button.
You don't usually see strap-hangers carrying newspapers these days.
But one guy with the New York Times is seen getting on a crowded F Train. He notices a single seat not taken. Suspicious, he gets closer and sniffs it out. The seat is discolored but dry. Throwing caution to the winds, he removes a section from the paper and sets it down to buffer the spot from his behind. He sits down, stretches his feet and yells out: "Try sitting on your smartphones, suckers!"
How did Stephen Hawking die? His wife needed to charge her iPhone.
Are you a Samsung Galaxy Note 7? Because I want to explode in you!
