Slip jokes
Your mom's so heavy that it caused Atlas, the Titan, to slip a disc.
A is for Amy who fell down the stairs.
B is for Basil assaulted by bears.
C is for Clara who wasted away.
D is for Desmond thrown out of a sleigh.
E is for Ernest who choked on a peach.
F is for Fanny sucked dry by a leech.
G is for George smothered under a rug.
H is for Hector done in by a thug.
I is for Ida who drowned in a lake.
J is for James who took lye by mistake.
K is for Kate who was struck with an axe.
L is for Leo who swallowed some tacks.
M is for Maud who was swept out to sea.
N is for Neville who died of ennui.
O is for Olive run through with an awl.
P is for Prue trampled flat in a brawl.
Q is for Quentin who sank in a mire.
R is for Rhoda consumed by a fire.
S is for Susan who perished of fits.
T is for Titus who flew into bits.
U is for Una who slipped down a drain.
V is for Victor squashed under a train.
W is for Winnie embedded in ice.
X is for Xerxes devoured by mice.
Y is for Yorick whose head was knocked in.
Z is for Zillah who drank too much gin.
Russian, American, and Polish stood by the lake shore.
Russian ran ahead to dive and yelled "vodka" and the lake changed into vodka.
Polish ran ahead to dive and yelled "beer" and the lake changed into beer.
American ran to dive, slipped, and said, "oh shit."
found this at imgflip: https://imgflip.com/i/751nxa
Community talk
Am I the only one here who, after not having read it and trying to do what he said, finds themselves caught between the lines of yearly contradicting statements? One dumbass, quick to spout age and place, like it means anything, states with conviction where he stays, though stays what? Jumbled thoughts of those who jump, the ones who barely piece together meaning, and there they are, 14-year-olds or maybe something else, real scary. Like the edge of sense slipping, and who’s there to catch it? Not the one who read it, that’s for sure, because what he said isn’t even said, just echoes bouncing, contradicting every turn with a yearly grin.
DONT SLIP, DONT TRIP, DONT FALL, COME TO THE CRIB, AND TAKE OF YO DRAWS!!!!
Shut up boy you look like a velociraptor in a clogged toilet bowl! Bruh you look like an off brand Ben 10 character! Nah you ain’t Ben 10 you Steven 9! Get yo ass back boy, you look like you got expelled for barking at yo lunch lady! Shut yo ass up boy, you ain’t from Jurassic Park, you came from the prehistoric playground! Get yo ass out boy you like Clifford the big red dog’s fossil! Boy what are you talking about … Read more