Simpson jokes

Simpsons.

Meet the Simpsons.

They're the greatest modern family.

From the town of Springfield.

They're a page right out of history.

Jesus and Satan are just basically Homer and Flanders. One tries to help the other, only for Satan to just say, "Shut up!"

"Homo Simpson"

What's the difference between what Bill Cosby did and what OJ Simpson did? OJ Simpson's victims actually suffered and I actually feel bad for them (the boyfriend at least).

Q: What’s Homer Simpson’s least favorite style of beer? A: Flanders Red Ale.

What do you call Mordecai dressing up as a basketball player?

Blue Jay Simpson!

What did Homer Simpson say when he ran over a deer? "DOE!"

Why can’t Homer Simpson bring his family into Moe’s Tavern?

Because there’s a bartender in there.

What's yellow and smells of Marge? Homer Simpson's fingers!

For all those Simpsons fans out there, this one I'm sure you know:

Abe: "It's rotten being old. No one listens to you."

Lisa: "It's awful being a kid. No one listens to you."

Homer: "I'm a white male, aged 18-49. Everyone listens to me--no matter how dumb my suggestions are."

There is a feminist group in my town.

It is called Gal-Qaeda.

(I actually got this from The Simpsons, so credit to the show.)

What is the difference between Nicole Brown Simpson and cancer?

OJ couldn’t kill cancer.

Donald Trump is to white Americans as O.J. Simpson is to black Americans. They will never choose to convict these people even if they murdered or raped.

What do you call a simp, Adrian?

So, there was a kid named Bobby, and he was writing notes. He asked his mother, who was on a phone call, "what is one plus one?" She said, "I HATE YOU." Then he asked his brother what is 2 + 2, who was watching a Batman movie, said, "NU NU NU NU NU NU NU NU NU NU BATMAN!" Then he asked his dad what is 4 plus 4, who was playing football, said, "85 SMACK EM DOWN!" Then he asked his sister 8+8, (she was playing with barbies), and she said, "My buns are burning." Then he went to school and told her teacher the first note he wrote down. The teacher sent him to the principal’s office. The principal yelled, "WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE?!" Bobby said, "NU NU NU NU NU NU NU NU NU NU BATMAN!" The principal yelled, "HOW MANY SPANKINGS DO YOU WANT?!" Then he said, "85 SMACK EM DOWN!" Then he walked away from the principal’s office and said, "my buns are burning."

Spongebob is yellow, and he can't drive. Must be Asian.

Why can't orphans watch "The Simpsons"?

Because they don't know who's Homer.