Simple

Simple jokes

Visa

  • I am crying tears of joy rn.😭 I was wrongfully denied my visa. ☠️ They took me to the Q&A section, that I needed to answer one simple question for my visa to be granted.

    The question was the original synonym of Bench. I shakily answered "Pristiano Penaldo" 😭. I was right guys ✅🛫

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  • Family

  • People always ask what the secret of our family's happiness is. It is simple really.

    1. Television and computer games are limited to a couple of hours each week.

    2. We all give each other a hand when needed.

    Last but not least, we play Twister.

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  • Plumber

  • I have a better version of this joke.

    How to make a plumber cry: Simple, kill his family. That’ll definitely turn on the waterworks.

    Penis

  • Life is like a penis: simple, soft, relaxed, and hanging free, until a woman comes around and makes it hard.

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  • Difference

  • I made a website for orphans. It doesn’t have a home page.

    What’s the difference between a Lamborghini and a dead body? I don’t have a Lamborghini in my garage.

    What is the difference between Iron Man and Iron Woman? One is a superhero and the other is a simple command.

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  • Water

  • Two simple steps to get 15,000 people to follow you:

    Step 1: Buy a bottle of water (doesn't matter the size).

    Step 2: Run through Africa with that bottle of water.

    Perfect! Now you got yourself half the population there following you!

  • 0
  • Orphan

  • I once saw an orphan... I decided to ask them a simple question... "Hey! Where is your family?"

    They didn't reply.

    I kept asking them. They started crying. I started laughing. They ran away...

    Answer

  • Someone asked me why I'm still here... the answer is simple: I don't want to be used as a school assembly.

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  • Homework

  • Little Johnny was finishing up his homework when the teacher gave him an assignment for the day. The instructions were simple: compare two objects; we will work on contrast next week.

    Boredom

  • Did you know curing boredom is quite simple?

    For instance, you could pretend to be an apple by tying a rope around your neck for a stem.

    Penis

  • For boys, life is a lot like a penis: simple, soft, straight, relaxed, and hanging freely......... then a woman makes it really hard.😩😉😏

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  • Kid

  • So I saw a 15 year old kid near a 15 year old girl checking her out.

    Then I told him, "What are you doing?"

    He told me he will decorate her locker, donate a lot of money to her, and buy her a lot of stuff.

    He then told me how easy would that be?

    I told him: "That sounds pretty SIMPle."