Shelter jokes
You look like a heroin addict in a women's refuge.
There was a kid crying. I asked him where his parents were. He cried more. I love working at an orphanage.
I asked a pretty, young homeless woman if I could take her home. She smiled at me and said yes.
The look on her face soon changed, however, when I walked off with her cardboard box.
I once told an orphan to go big or go home. He replied, "I can't get home; it got bombed."
What's the first thing that a battered woman does when she gets out of the shelter?
My last if she knows what's good for her.
What does a woman do when she leaves the battered women's shelter?
"Cook my dinner, if she knows what's good for her."
Dear Orphans,
I have a better orphanage for you. It's my basement :)
Why couldn’t the orphan find home?
Didn’t have eyes.
Why do orphans live on the street?
They don't have parents to put a roof over their head.
I made a house for orphans and...
they had no clue how to use it.
What does an orphan and a military man not have in common? Neither gets to go back home.
Why was the orphan walking through the neighborhood? I don't know, either. It's not like he has a home to go to.
Why doesn't the orphan's phone have a homepage, being it doesn't have a home?
What does the child with no hands get for Christmas? Unknown. He hasn't opened it yet.
What does a homeless man in New York get for Christmas? Hypothermia.
Why do orphans want to be dogs?
Because they want their own bed and food.
Why does rapeboat like going to the dog shelter? It's cheaper than a whore house.
Apple created the iPhone X for orphans because they don't have a home.
Homeless person says to a rich person, "I'm homeless."
Rich person: "Then buy a house!"
A family put their kid and their dog in an orphanage but came back for only the dog.
What's another place orphans can't work at besides SC Johnson?
The Home Depot.