Shelter Jokes

Mrs. Harolen: Students, tomorrow's assignment is to bring your parents to school for a conference with the teacher information.

Garen: I want to know who cannot bring their parents to a conference. ORPHANS!

Students: Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

Mrs. Harolen: Garen sit down! NOW!

Garen: Hey, why can't orphans get a dog? They don't have their parents to drive them to the animal shelter.

Halen: Yeah! Why are orphans racist? Because they never saw their parents with a different race!

Students: No, that's not funny!

Student: SHUT UP!

Why couldn’t the orphan find home?

Didn’t have eyes.

What's another place orphans can't work at besides SC Johnson?

The Home Depot.

What do you call 2 homeless people throwing rocks at each other? "Pillow Fight!"

Where did the orphan go after the orphanage blew up everywhere?

Why do orphans play Minecraft? Because they have no home.

I made a house for orphans and...

they had no clue how to use it.

Homeless person says to a rich person, "I'm homeless."

Rich person: "Then buy a house!"

Q: Where did Lucy go during the bombing?

A: Everywhere!

Why was the orphan walking through the neighborhood? I don't know, either. It's not like he has a home to go to.

Why do orphans use iPhone X's?

Because they can't find home.

What's your favorite place that orphans can't go to?

Home.

What do you call an orphan with parents?

Idk, I never met one before.

Bonus joke: I went up to an orphan and asked where his parents were. He said, "I don’t have any." I said, "Wonder why."

Another bonus joke: Me: Hey. Orphan: Hey. Me: What do you do for fun? Orphan: Look for my parents. Me: Me, so they're not dead? Orphan: No, they just abandoned me.

More bonus: What do you call a homeless kid?

An orphan.

Last bonus: Why don’t orphanages teach kids about home?

Because they can’t find one.

lmao this is so funny, dark humor can be funny. Sorry, orphans!

My wife asked me to get her a puppy. I agreed and went to an animal shelter. As I was searching for a puppy, a fire was set, and the entire animal shelter burned down.

A few hours later, I returned to my wife. She knew I had no puppies and asked why. I replied, "I couldn't find any." She understood but was upset, so I gave her something that I did get. She said, "Wow! This is good, what smokehouse did you get this at?"

What does a woman do when she leaves the battered women's shelter?

"Cook my dinner, if she knows what's good for her."

What do you call a grown-up orphan? Homeless.

Why did the mushroom get a new house?

Because there wasn’t mushroom!

What's worse than having an honorary degree from Harvard? Being homeless and having an honorary degree from Harvard.

I made a website for orphans.

It has no home page.

I asked a pretty, young homeless woman if I could take her home. She smiled at me and said yes.

The look on her face soon changed, however, when I walked off with her cardboard box.