A woman walks out of the shower, winks at her boyfriend, and says, "Honey, I shaved myself down there. Do you know what that means?" The boyfriend says, "Yeah, it means the drain is clogged again." An old woman walked into a dentist's office, took off all her clothes, and spread her legs. The dentist said, "I think you have the wrong room." "You put in my husband's teeth last week," she replied. "Now you have to remove them." A penguin takes his car to the shop and the mechanic says it'll take about an hour for him to check it. While he waits, the penguin goes to an ice cream shop and orders a big sundae to pass the time. The penguin isn't the cleanest eater, and he ends up covered in melted ice cream. When he returns to the shop, the mechanic takes one look at him and says, "Looks like you blew a seal." "No," the penguin insists, "it's just ice cream." If your Uncle Jack was on his roof, and he wanted you to help him down, would you help your Uncle Jack off? A family's driving behind a garbage truck when a dildo flies out and thumps against the windshield. Embarrassed, and trying to spare her young son's innocence, the mother turns around and says, "Don't worry, dear. That was just an insect." "Wow," the boy replies. "I'm surprised it could get off the ground with a cock like that!"
A couple is on their first date. Man: How do you feel about sex? Woman: I like it infrequently. Man: I see. Is that one word or two?
If having sex for money makes you a wh*re then what does having sex for free make you? Non-profit wh*reganisation
What does a Chinese man say to his partner when having sex? "Ching Chong Soc Mai Ding Dong"
After death, what is the only organ in the female body which remains warm?
My penis.
Why don’t old people have sex
When was the last time you tried pulling apart a grilled cheese that old
I was at a bar the girl said sex, sex free sex tonight when she really said 663629
Why do women always have sex with the lights off?
Because they never like to see a man having a good time.
I asked my Dad the other day.."At what age is it ok to have sex with girls?"He replied "When they leave school son, they are legal" Apparently 3.15pm is not what he meant.
Q. How does an Isis terrorist practice safe sex?
A. He marks the camels that kick.
This isn’t much of a joke but pickup line ok it’s this. Are you a marshmallow because I wanna put my stick in u
How do you make your girlfriend scream during sex?
Call and tell her about it.
How do you know if you’ve walked into a sex addicts counselling session? The psychologist will thank you for coming
what's a brother and sister from Alabama favorite sex position? the cowgirl
Chuck Norris is a genius for this : Walker Texas Ranger = Wrangler Karate Sex
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