School shooting jokes
When the school shooter finally leaves your classroom, but then the autistic kid next to you's sketchers light up.
I say 1, 2, 3, all the kids bullied me, but now they're not so cool, cuz I shot up the school.
I went to school and everyone was screaming and looking at me. They weren't after I shot them, though.
I went to the shooting range the other day. After a while, I realized I was the only one there. So, I decided to go home and saw on the news that there was a mass school shooting and there were reporters on the scene. Man, I knew I should have stayed around a little longer.
Two boys are talking on the bus.
Boy 1: I feel like I'm forgetting something.
Boy 2: Hey, did you hear about that school shooting last week?
Boy 1: Oh, that's right.
Today, my mom gave me a lecture on how to stay safe during school shootings. When my brother walked past, my mom asked me a question: "What do you think of going through kids' heads during a school shooting?" That's when my brother came back downstairs and said to me and my mom, "Bullets." We don't talk about this anymore.
What do you think is going through kids' heads during school shootings? Bullets.
One of the students reported a school shooting. That fucking snitch...
Sandy Hook is my favorite holiday.
What if some kid was like, "I'm going to shoot up the school!", and then someone just pulls up with a reverse card?
When you lose a game of Kahoot, so you kashoot up the school.
An American is lecturing a British person, saying things like "it's an elevator, not a lift" and "it's chips, not crisps" etc. After a while of this, the British person calmly retorted, "they're schools, not shooting ranges."
*Hears the news about Sandy Hook* Person 1: "God, I can only imagine what was going through those kids' heads in the last moments of their lives..."
Person 2: "Probably Bullets."
Person 1: "OMG!! Can you even think of what their parents are going through?!"
Person 2: "Probably Coffin Brochures."
Person 1: "...."
Person 2: "It's called dark humor. Dark humor is like food, not everyone gets it."
Why did the Columbine High School basketball team lose the big game?
Because they lost their two best shooters...
I was at a funeral for some kids in a school shooting. I don't understand why everyone was so sad, so I asked a lady, "what's so sad?" and she said "What do you think was running through these kid's heads before they died?" I replied "probably a bullet". She gasped and said "do you have any idea how insensitive that is? What do you think is running through their parent's heads?" I said "probably all the money they're losing from this funeral."
Somebody called the cops for a school shooting, what a snitch!
What do you call a school shooting survivor who grows up to be a prostitute on the West Coast? A Sandy Hooker
My friend was a victim of a school shooting once, but he couldn't tell if they were in the library because of the suppressor on his AR.
How are school shooting victims and school shooting jokes similar? They never get old.
How do you knock out 26 kids in one punch?
You give them a Sandy Hook.