Rich Person jokes
What does a rich person eat? 24 karats/carrots!
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Homeless person says to a rich person, "I'm homeless."
Rich person: "Then buy a house!"
Q. What do you call a rich person who is in a vegetative state?
A. A loaded potato.
Today I donated my watch, phone, and $500 to a poor guy. You wouldn't believe the happiness I felt as he slid the pistol back into his pocket.
Average Kid: brings mp3 to school.
Rich Kid: Brings mp4 to school.
Quiet Kid: Brings an mp5.
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Women only call me ugly until they find out how much money I make. Then they call me ugly and poor.
How do women make you a millionaire?
When you're a billionaire.
I won the lottery for a million dollars today, so I decided to donate a quarter of it to charity.
I now have $999,999.75.