I took a pole today. 100% of the people in the tent were unhappy that it collapsed.

What's a pirate's favorite key on the keyboard?

Others: R.

Rrrr, you would think so, but it be the C.

A lot of people get mad at me for my bad jokes. I always thought they were punderful.

I was hitting my hand, and my mom asked me what I was doing. I said I'm beating my meat.

The other day someone stole my mood ring. I don't know how to feel about that.