Pack

Pack Jokes

Little Johnny runs up to his mother and says, "mommy mommy, the other day I was playing with my ball upstairs and my ball got away and into your closet, and when I went to get it, daddy came in with the lady next door and they started hugging and kissing and the lady next door took off daddy's clothes and daddy took off the clothes from the lady next door, and they both got into your bed, and the lady next door got on top of daddy and started...". The mother cuts him off and says "just stop right there. You wait until your daddy comes home so you can tell him everything you just told me." Couple hours later the father arrives and walks through the door to find his wife and child with bags packed. She walks up to him and slaps across the face shouting "I'm leaving you... Go ahead Johnny, tell him what you told me earlier." Johnny steps forward to tell his daddy. "Daddy, the other day I was playing with my ball upstairs and my ball got away and into your closet, and when I went to get it, you came in with the lady next door and you both started hugging and kissing and the lady next door took off your clothes and you took off the clothes from the lady next door, and you both got into your bed, and the lady next door got on top of you and started doing the same thing mom did with uncle joe last summer."

Drop me in afghanistan with a dodge challenger super stock, a mexican named jose, a 6 pack of dr.pepper, a golden scar, a pack of chimichangas and a M4A1 and ill have the taliban saying the pledge of allegence in 4 hours.

There lived a jackal in a forest he did not get the day's food so he was very hungry and wandered throughout the forest but could not find any food finally he dicided to go to the city as he was walking into the city as soon as he was walking he heard some dogs bark soon he found a group of dogs running towards him so he rushed into a nearby house which belonged to a Dyer and fell into a tub filled with blue dye the dogs that were chasing him returned back as they could not find him the jackal came out blue from the tub and went into the forest every animal In the forest were frightened to see a new animal the jackal realised that all animals were afraid of him and took advantage of the situation he called the animal towards him the jackal said oh my dear friends I have been sent by gods in heaven to protect you all I will be the king of this jungle all the animals became very happy everyday they served him food and took care of all his needs they came to him with all their problems and listened to what there king said one day as the king jackal was sitting by the court he heard a pack of jackals howling in the forest for a long time he had not heard these voices he felt very happy forgetting he was the king he howled back immediately all the animals knew who he really was and started chasing him in anger but the jackal he was already on the run

Can't anyone relate to this? BEAT WATERSHARKY!!! -Oops!-By- Air Attack Productions and Yung Gravy-Ayy, supercalifragilisticexpiali dope shit Supercalifragi lick my ex be on some ho shit Superman, I get dem bands but ain't gon' buy you roses Super-duper get them cougars, took my wrist and froze it Super-duper hoes Y'all got Oompa Loompa hoes I ain't never knew ya hoes Prolly still ran through 'em, though

Oh, wait, wait, I, I do know your ho? You talkin' 'bout, you talkin' 'bout Tracy? Nah, you mean like, like, Tracy with the ass? Tracy with the, with the Honda? Shit, well

Oops, baby Fuck up on your bitch, like oopsy daisy Never knew that was your boo, baby Hit her five times in the coupe, Mercedes, whoopsie daisy Oops, baby Gravy hit my bitch, yeah, whoopsie daisy I just tryna hit, it's my duty, baby Sippin' on the goose, like Boosie, baby Yeah, I said oops, baby Fuck up on your bitch, like oopsy daisy Never knew that was your boo, baby Hit her five times in the coupe, Mercedes, whoopsie daisy Oops, baby Gravy hit my bitch, yeah, whoopsie daisy I just tryna hit, it's my duty, baby Sippin' on the goose, like Boosie, baby

Lil' bitch, I'm happy and I know it so I clap them fuckin' cheeks, yeah I'm happy and I show it to your momma in the sheets And I'm happy she's a freak ho, happy so my teeth glow Yeah, my bitch elite, I be clapping every week My neck, my back, got your momma on my sack My checks, my racks, it's the return of the motherfuckin' mack And I stay with the pack, though Clap, clap, then I'm out the backdoor Lil' Pillsbury, I stack dough Walkin' with a limp, like a crack ho

Yeah, I said oops, baby Fuck up on your bitch, like oopsy daisy Never knew that was your boo, baby Hit her five times in the Coupe, Mercedes, whoopsie daisy Oops, baby Gravy hit my bitch, yeah, whoopsie daisy I just tryna hit, it's my duty, baby Sippin' on the goose, like Boosie, baby Yeah, I said oops, baby Fuck up on your bitch, like oopsy daisy Never knew that was your boo, baby Hit her five times in the Coupe, Mercedes, whoopsie daisy Oops, baby Gravy hit my bitch, yeah, whoopsie daisy I just tryna hit, it's my duty, baby Sippin' on the goose, like Boosie, baby

A boy and girl in high school started dating for a while and things were going so well that the girl decided to invite the boy on a weekend trip. She said "I want you to come spend the weekend at our lakehouse and meet my parents. While we're there, I'd also like to take our relationship to the next level." "I'm there" the boy replied. The boy was so excited that he ran straight to the pharmacy to pick up some protection. He walked up to the pharmacist and told him about his weekend to come and said he needed some condoms. The pharmacist asked "do you want the 3 pack, 6 pack, or family sized 24 pack?" the boy replied " "I plan on getting busy all weekend. I'm not gonna stop pounding her till I'm black and blue. Give me the family pack." "Sure thing" said the pharmacist. That weekend the boy went to the lakehouse and the whole family was sitting down at the dinner table to pray. the girls father asked the boy to say grace. The boy prayed and prayed. Almost ten minutes went by. Finally, the girl leaned over to the boy and said, "you never told me that you were so religious" the boy replied, "You never told me that your dad was a pharmacist"

There are 4 people on a airplane and the pilot has a heart attack and dies the plane is going down and there are also only 3 parachutes so the guy who knows how to cure cancer says I’m jumping I can save many lives the the 46 president joe Biden says I’m take ing the 2 one so there is only one left Donald trump says to the 7 year old girl I have lived a long life u an take the next one so the little girl says that’s ok the 46 president took my back pack.lol

I tried to right the shortest joke ever, so I wrote a two word joke, which was Dwarf Shortage. its just so I could pack more jokes into the show.

Fat people:do I look beautiful when I eat a pack of chicken

Me:Yes you look like a bunch of boulders crashing in to each other

Fat: dang... Me:shut up jon Browser minnoch

so a guy gets a motorcycle with authentic leather seats and the dealer tells him ‘dude the rain will ruin the seats get it under something if it starts raining and worst case scenario put vaseline all over the seats to make it water proof’. so he goes to his girlfriend house that night for dinner and before he goes inside she says ‘listen this is your first time meeting your parents we have a rule, the first one to speak has to do the dishes’. so he walks inside and sees a mountain of dishes over 3 months because no one has spoken and the stench is awful. during dinner he concocted a plan to get someone to speak so he started doing all of this crazy shit to try and get someone to speak. not a peep eventually he grabs his girlfriend bends her over and starts going to town. still nothing the parents are outraged but not speaking because they don’t want to do the dishes. after about a minute of this he walks away and does the same to her mum and starts going to town. now the dad is pissed and just staring him down with daggers. at that moment it starts to rain his motorcycle is out in the rain and grabs the vaseline out of his pack pocket and the dad goes ‘FINE ILL DO THE DISHES’

One day a father went out for some cold beer and threw the 18 pack in the back seat on top of the infant in the car seat. Fortunately it was light beer.