Outing jokes

What's the difference between a teacher and a train?

The teacher says, "Spit out your gum," but a train says, "Chew chew!"

What did the turtle do when he ran out of gas?

He went to the Shell station.

How do you make holy water?

You take normal water and boil the hell out of it.

How do you get 30 drunk Canadians out of the pool?

"Please get out of the pool."

Did you hear that Daft Punk came out with a cook book?

It's called "One More Thyme."

What's big, green, has four legs, and if it falls out of a tree, it can kill you?

A pool table.

Chuck Norris doesn't flush the toilet.

He scares the shit out of it.

How do you make holy water?

You boil the hell out of it.