Occult jokes

What do you call a really fat psychic?

4chin Teller

Why do we not have female magicians? Because last time we had them, we burned them alive.

Why is an orphan into worshiping Satan?

'Cause they get to call someone "master" and be freaky.

So, if the reason people used to hang women was because they were seen as witches back in the day, if boys were to be hung, would they be called wizards?

He had the curse of vanishing.

Bro, my friend is always using zodiacs as an excuse.

The other day he said he couldn't hang out with me because of cancer. I told him to fuck off. Then I realized why he was mad after that...

What's a witch's favorite subject?

Went to see a psychic the other day.

I knocked on the door, and she said, "Who is it?"

So I turned around and left.