No jokes
Friend: Your t-shirt is cringe.
Me: You should go get the Covid test because one of their symptoms is no taste.
No joke. I just want to say that my thoughts are with the Ukrainian people, and I wish them the best. Best of luck.
There was this boy. He had diarrhea, and he kept asking to go to the bathroom, but the teacher said no. Next thing you know, he pooped himself in front of the class.
By the way, why are there no knock knock jokes about America?
Because freedom rings, but they never answer that door.
Enjoy!
What's the best thing about stage 4 cancer... no stage 5.
Memes
Why can’t orphans be gay?
Because they have no one to call "daddy."
Why can't Tottenham open a restaurant? Because they have no silverware.
Boyfriend: Let's go to bed.
Girlfriend: No.
Boyfriend: Why?
Girlfriend: Because you want sex.
Boyfriend: No, I don't.
NEXT MINUTE
The man could hear banging.
My ill sis said, "Why did the bear say no to ice cream?" and I said, "Why?" She said, "'Cuz it's stuffed!"
Why is an orphan really good at being naughty?
Because they have no one to tell them off.
So, a neutron went to a bar. He asked the bartender how much for a beer. The bartender said, "For you, no charge."
What do you call someone with no body and no nose?
Nobody knows.
If you put an amputee with no limbs in a snuggie, it becomes a stubbie.
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
Fffffsshhhhhh
Mom: See that guy over there with no hands, tell him to clap.
Son: Mom, I'm blind.
Mom: Exactly!
What did one plane say to the other?
"It’s been a long day, I’m ready to crash."
Other plane: "No you’re not, we haven’t even gotten high yet!"
Q: Where did Sally go on her bike? A: Nowhere.
Where do you find a cow with no legs?
Right where you left it!
Why can’t orphans celebrate Christmas?
Because they have no family.
Knock, knock.
"Who's there?"
Cow says,
"Cow says who?"
No! Cow says moo!