Worst Jokes Ever
"I'm sorry" and "my bad" mean the same thing. Except at a funeral.
Me: I am the second worst thing that happened to these orphans.
Friend: What was the first?
Me: They- they weren't always orphans.
Friend: O-O
What are two things orphans can’t have?
Parents.
Iran: We can beat the USA.
Japan: You do realize we beat him in Battleship, and he dropped the sun on us.
Iran: So?
Japan: Twice!
Iran: We can beat the USA.
Japan is typing...
The school shooter when the cops show up be like:
"Ain't nothing gonna break my stride, ain't nothing gonna hold me down. Oh oh. I've got to keep on moving."
Q: Why do orphans work at Olive Garden?
A: Because when you're there, you're family.
Queen, (DYM 86)
What do you call gay men receiving anonymous blowjobs at the glory holes inside an adult bookstore?
Norwegian massage.
Do you know why God created wars? To teach Americans geography.
Why was the fanny flat?
So it can flop about.
What are two things that an orphan can’t have?
Two parents.
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
Because they can’t run home.
Why does an orphan have an iPhone X?
Because they have no home button.
Guys, say "A wrecked isle dysfunction" really loud and you will get good luck for 10 years.
Why can't orphans have sex?
They do not have anyone to call "daddy."
What do you call 6 gay guys in war? Rainbow Six Siege.
1st graders: Ay yo girl, I think you’re beautiful, let’s get married!!
2nd graders: Uhh, don’t tell my mom that we’re dating!! She won’t let me date! Let’s keep this a seeeeecret heeheehee.
3rd graders: Uh, my teacher told me to stay after school because I wrote a poem about you and I’m 9 years old, we have to break up, sweetie.
4th graders: Hey, I think you’re cute!! Wanna date? I don’t think my girlfriend will mind.......
5th graders (they start wearing makeup): Ay girl, your eyelashes are pretty, I like you now, wanna date? Here’s my numberrrrrr.
6th graders: Heyyyyy, I gotta tell you a secret, I got a crush on you!! Don’t tell anyone!! Byeee, ooh, I’ll text you later!
7th graders: We need to make Peyton jealous because she broke up with you!! Wanna date? I mean, you’re not hot, but still, great personalityyyyy, alright, bye now.
8th graders: Hi sweetheart, I got STARRRBUCKKKSSS
Me: UGLY AF AND LITERALLY NO BOYFRIEND.....
At first, I was a boy trapped in a girl's body, then I was born.
We can't go under it...
We can't go over it...
We have to go through it!