Morbid Jokes

I like my men like i like my whiskey. irish and put in a barrel for 2 years with barely any oxegen.

Why are women like hurricanes?

They come in nasty and wet then leave with your house and car.

What do pedophiles and a SpongeBob intro have in common?

Are you ready kids?

Namaste 6 feet away or I'll blow you away with this AK

So I found out a rainbow is basically where a guy ejaculate In a females mouth and he swallows her period juice and they both kiss each other swishing it together in each other's mouth and it forms a rainbow and a strawberry shortcake is basically where a dude ejaculates on females face and then punching her in the nose Causing her to bleed that's why it's called a strawberry shortcake

Whats the difference between my ass and the todlers in my uncles basement

My ass dosent cry when he stickes it in late at night

My name is Joe Biden and I am running for US Senate.

one day a couple was walking when the man stepped on something hard and squishy then they heard a sound from the bushes, instead of looking down they both ran.

two years later they turned on the TV to find Ted Bundy on trial they asked him if he has ever been caught he said "No but a couple was walking as soon as i killed a girl i jumped into a bush they didnt know i was there but the man stepped on the dead body but didn't look down then he and his girlfriend ran."

Robin Williams’ death was the most horrible impression ever given. (RIP Robin Williams, you will be missed)

Never take a person canoeing or kayaking if they had a cerebrovascular accident. They’ll hear the one word they hate the most. “STROKE, STROKE, STROKE”