Makeup jokes
So I came across a guy who was carrying a ton of clothing and makeup.
And I asked him what he is doing.
Guy: Some kawaii girl told me if I bought and brought her this crap, she would let me play with her tits.
Me: Erm... Are you a simp?
Two minutes later, the guy arrived at Kawaii Girl's house.
KG: You have it?
Guy: Yup, now can I play with them?
KG: Sure!
KG then went to her room.
Guy: Ohhhh, I know what your going to do. You're gonna call me over and you will be-
KG then held a bird cage with two birds in it.
KG: Have fun playing with them!
Guy: WHAT THE FU-
Why did the girl 馃懅 bring lipstick 馃拕 to beauty school?
Because she had a make-up exam.
Q. Why don't cannibals eat clowns?
A. Because they hate the taste of their stupid clown wigs, makeup, and retarded shoes.
Girlfriend: I just lost 5 pounds!
Me: How many makeup wipes did you need?
Most people say I'm a clown. Yet they don't laugh at my jokes. Most people avoid me because I'm a "clown". Yet I'm not the center of the circus. But I know I'm gonna be a clown forever. Because I can't take this damn mask off, no matter how hard I try.
Weeks later: Finally I found out why I'm being called a clown...because my smiling face is fake...
I鈥檓 a clown...
And everyone knows.
Why do women wear makeup and perfume?
Because they're ugly and smell bad.
I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high.
She looked at me surprised.
(P.S. I am not at that age plus I am as straight as a helix ruler.)
The eyelash and the lipstick got into a fight. Soon they will make up.
I told my girlfriend she drew her eyebrows too high. She seemed surprised.
What do women put on their ears to look more attractive?
Their knees.