Living room floor jokes
Mom: You can't die in the living room, David, so you can stop stabbing and shooting yourself.
David: I will surpass Kakarot!
Jordan: *dead on the living room floor*
Your mum's vagina is so ravenous, that last night we both ended up on the living room floor, with her on top. She was eating my creamy young face off.
Your mom was absolutely getting drilled by me on the living room floor last night.
My mom told me it's not healthy to stay in my room all day... but the only places I'm allowed to go to are my room and downstairs.
My ceiling isn't the best... But it's up there!
Police: Where do you live?
Me: With my parents.
Police: Where do your parents live?
Me: With me.
Police: Where do you all live?
Me: Together.
Police: Where is your house?
Me: Next to my neighbor.
Police: Where is your neighbor’s house?
Me: If I tell you, you won't believe me.
Police: Tell me.
Me: Next to my house.
When you realize you forgot to mop your room, you hear footsteps.
If you are American in the living room, what are you in the bathroom?
Euro-peein'.