Kidnapper

Kidnapper Jokes

Kidnapping

POV: An Asian kidnapper kidnapped an Asian kid, and the kidnapper called the kid's mom. Then the mom said, "No, it's fine, my kid got a B, he failed." And the kidnapper let him go saying he doesn't need a failure.

Road

Why did the kidnapper cross the road?

To get the kids at the playground.

Orphan

An orphan was running down the road. A car pulled up and said, "Get in." So the orphan got in and said, "Where are we going?" The kidnapper said, "I'm taking you to my house." The orphan replied, "OML, ARE YOU ADOPTING ME!?"

Orphan

Why can't orphans be kidnapped?

Because most kidnappers use a family van.

Orphanage

Kidnapper: Hey kid, your parents told me to pick you up.

Kid: Sir, this is an orphanage.

Kidnapper: ...

Orphan

Kidnapper: Hey kid, your mom told me to follow me.

Orphan: But I don't have a mom!

Mickey Mouse

What do kidnappers and Mickey Mouse have in common? They say, "Come inside, it’s fun inside."

Rapist

Q: What do kidnappers and rapists have in common?

H: It's similar to shoes.

A: White Vans.

Kid

Kid: Dad, what happened to the kidnapper?

Dad: He had a nap.

Kid: Where is he now?

Dad: HELL!