Insult jokes

Your mom is the biggest tosser on the planet, yeah, you heard right.

I don't have to strain myself a blood vessel and be wankin' solo anymore; she saved me a whole load of arthritis.

When someone says you're adopted, say, "But you're still at the orphanage."

Your forehead built like Darkseid from DC.

Ur dad

Omg, I'm sooooo sry!!!!!

Man: "Is your body from McDonald's?"

Woman: "Why, because you're loving it?"

Man: "No, because it's fat and greasy."

Your forehead is so huge, you don't have dreams, you have movies. Follow me on Instagram: _zer0x3.

When someone says: "You're a mistake."

Say: "The only mistake I see is right in front of me."

Your hairline is so ugly, like your mum.

What do you call a gay cactus?

A "prick."

Your mom gay.

Sister: You're adopted.

Me: At least they wanted me, they must feel terribly bad cuz they had to keep you :(

I said to my wife that she's so ugly that she threw a boomerang and it never came back.

Roses are red, flowers are pretty, I heard your mom has a nice pair of titties.

Yo mama so fat that she had to wear a yellow jacket and everyone shouted, "Taxi!"

Your hairline caused the solar flare.

Yo mama so fat that when she went into a crowd wearing a blue shirt, everyone yelled, "Tsunami!"

If you're in a roast battle with a homophobe and they are talking mad shit, just say:

"The only thing looser than your mouth is your asshole!"

Bully: I bet your dick is so small when you look down you can't see it.

Guy: I don't, I see your mom.

My mum told me to take out the trash, but I couldn’t find you.

Yo mama so clumsy, she gave birth to you.