How come Mr. Squirrel watches porn sometimes?
Sometimes he feels like a nut, sometimes he don't.
Bully: how is your girlfriend? Me:I don't have one! BULLY: I KNOW! ME:HOW are you parents? *Walks out of orphanage*
How do you call an autistic kid with a pistol? Special forces
What is a orphans least favorite show: “how I met your mother”
How is the business in Ukraine? It's booming.
How did the computer hackers get away from the scene of the crime?
I think they just hacked the "chrime."
How do baseballs communicate?
They touch base!
How long was the owl trick or treating?
Owl night long!
Q: How many children does it take to shingle a roof?
A: Depends on how thinly you slice them.
I was in the Sahara Desert, dying of thirst. Thankfully, Pionel Pessi, the debut man, came to my rescue👨🚒. He brought in 100's of helicopters filled with bottles to quench my thirst. I asked him how he had so many bottles; "big games," he replied. Thanks for saving my life, my idol.
How did Helen Keller's parents punish her?
They stuck her in a round room and told her to find the penny in the corner.
how do u make a emo kid jump? a bridge.
How many emissions does it take to screw in a lightbulb
None they just sit in the dark and cry
How do you make an orphan clap until his hands bleed.
tell him to clap until his parents come home.
How do parents punish their blind kid? They move the bed.
How did Helen Keller parents punish her?
They told her to go find the light.
Emo girls be like: How much am I worth...
Girl, scan the code on your wrist!
WAIT! I remember how the joke goes! These two cannibals i hanging out eat lunch, which is a clown you see, cause there cannibals and one cannibal says to the other cannibal "Does this taste funny to you?
Imagine you're playing GTA and you finally found out how to take out a gun: Option 1: shoot someone Option 2: suicide
Me: Aren't they the same thing?
How do emos propose?
"Would you like to join my family tree?"
