My girlfriend told me she’s sad because she’s put on a bit of weight.
I told her to keep her chins up.
Her Jokes
I just went on a date with a woman in a wheelchair.
I stood her up, which made her fall for me. At first it was a drag, but now we’re rolling.
Your mama so fat, it took all the trees to build her a coffin.
Yo mama so ugly when she looked in the mirror, her reflection threw up and ran away.
A girl in the shop was getting bullied. She came to me saying, "I’m getting bullied." I told her, "Stand up for herself."
Why is it okay for a woman to use me when she feels like it, but when I use her body when I feel like it, I am the bad guy?
Yo mama's so fat that the earth used to be flat before they buried her.
Your mum is so bad at cooking, Gordon Ramsey brought back Hitler to show her how to use an oven.
How do you make an 8 year old girl cry twice?
Wipe your bloody cock off on her favorite teddy bear.
Yo mama so ugly, her portraits hang themselves.
Yo mama's so fat, it took me two buses and a train to get to her good side.
Stinking poo poo bum.
Joke of the day: Your mum is so fat I saw her at Greg’s! 😭🤣
Your mama so chubby, people call her fat.
Yo mama so stupid, she put a battery up her a** and said, "I GOT THE POWER!"
Why should a feminist never be allowed to join the UAW United Auto Workers?
Because the only thing that a feminist will do in the UAW United Auto Workers, is eat pussy all day inside the women's restroom and she will only pay her membership dues, if she is allowed to eat pussy all day inside the women's restroom.
Yo mama so fat, Zeus used her as a bowling ball.
Yo mama is so ugly, they tried to get her to act the part for Godzilla!
Me explaining my child: when your mom is sitting on a table during her period, it's called the periodic table.
Yo mama is so fat, they had to flood the Super Bowl to give her a bath.
Mom tells her son to go to the other kid, to walk to the kid just standing still, to clap so the kid can hear and move out of the way of the car.
But her son was blind, the other kid had no legs so he couldn't walk, and the kid has no arms so he couldn't clap, and the kid died because he couldn't hear; he was deaf.
