Newest Help Jokes - Page 10 - Worst Jokes Ever

HELP! HELP!

TELL THE PRIEST TO STOP TICKLING ME

There was a person inside, who needed help from the police, but the police changed their number, so he ordered a party with pizzas from 2 airplanes, but the pilots were stupid so they put in people instead of pizzas, and one landed on the 93rd floor, and the 94th floor, literally.

When you have to fight an emo kid but he brings his friends so you gotta fight the suicide squad. But you gotta get da bois to help you

9/11 called for help what did that get nothing

What if plants are farming us, giving us oxygen until we die, and turn into natural fertilizer which helps them?

I can’t help you find orphan jokes maybe ask their family

*COUGHS ROUGHLY* OH MY GOD IT HURTS SO MUCH I CANT SEE IT BURNS HELP !!! HELP !!! HELP !!! HELP *Weakly* !

Man goes to a doctor says he's having problems shitting so the doctor gives him so enama and says he needs to do it a few times at home but does the first one for him so the guy bends over the table lubs him up and shoves it deep in him and he yells. so later the man goes home and tells his wife he needs her help with the enama so he bends over she lubs him up puts a hand on his shouler and she shoves it up there and he starts screaming and cussing and the wife asks did I hurt u? He said no I just realized when the doctor did it he had both hands on my shoulders

Yesterday i saw an orphan walking down the street. I asked him if he was ok. He said no so i asked him if he needed help. And he said yes so i let him in my car and said dont worry you’ll be home with you parents soon. He said my parents died. I said i know.

Ring.. Ring.. Yes this this is Dave from the Orphanage, you make em we take em, how may I be of service?

What is the worst motivational thing to say to a suicidal person?

If at first you don’t succeed, try again and again until you succeed.

My fitness guru said that if I got raped it would help me in future marathons

Hey any riding with biden fans out their? I ran out of gas and could really use a ride so of one of ya'll can call me and pick me up that be great and I can't get gas because I only have 20 bucks which is like 1-5 an a half help me please

imagine getting a call and it says "welcome to Davids orphanage you make them we take them how may we help you.

One day there was a frantic call at the fire department:

"Help me, help me! There is a cat meowing nearby. It is going to hurt me, it's going to kill me, can you help me, and send the fire squad right away?"

"Take it easy, cats don’t hurt us, just relax and wait until he leaves."

"You don’t understand it is going to bite me, it is going to kill me, it is going to be fatal!"

"Cats aren’t venomous or in any other way dangerous, now who is calling?"

"I’m Indy's parrot you twit! Now help me! please help, please help!"