My friend said why do you have depression there is so much happiness in the world and I said why do you have asma there is so much air in the world
Why did Muhammad Ali go down because he couldn't stand the cancer
What did the doctor say to the Chinese patient? "Sum ting wong."
What do you call a white person having a seizure?
A vanilla shake.
Doctor: I'm sorry, but your surgery will cost a lot of money.
Buuuuut what's this behind your ear?
Oh, it's still cancer.
A girl was going through some really bad health issues at her house. It got so bad that she had to be rushed to the hospital. Her husband found out about this after work and went to check on her. When he got there, the desk lady immediately pointed down the hall to a doctor. The guy walked up to the doctor, "Are you the one taking care of my wife?" The doctor glanced away from his papers, "Yes, that would be me. But I am afraid that she is in very bad condition. I have bad news and good news. The bad news is that she will have to be wheeled around in a wheel chair. Also, she can't eat normally. Taking care of her will become very hard. Basically ot will be like taking care of a big baby." Shocked, the guys says, "Wait, if that's the bad news, than what is the good news?" The doctor goes, "I'm just kidding with you, she died!"
Why did the heterosexual man put a mask on his cock to protect himself from COVID? Silly boy.
health commercials be like:
serious side effects can cause:
Nausea, Diarrhea, vomiting, chills, fever, Cancer, Diabetes, Aids, Clamedia, Lupus, Ebola, polio, Leprosy, Pulmanary edema, heart attack, heart falure, yellow fever, but worst of all DEATH
Kid with Cancer: "When I get older, I want to be a movie star or a singer."
Nurse: *Laughs*
Kid: "Why are you laughing?"
Nurse: "When I get OLDER."
Proceeds to laugh.
Fun fact: The body positivity movement is the only movement without any actual movement.
Once upon a time, Bob was in his hospital bed receiving medical treatment soon after finding out he had cancer. One day, his friend Jeremy decided to visit Bob and told him this very inspiring sentence: "Sometimes in life, you and your heart will climb peaking mountains, and cross low valleys."
Little did Bob know that Jeremy was talking about his heart monitor.
I hate wearing a mask in public
Lol making jokes about cancer makes me feel better as a person that had cancer, it’s great
Have you seen the new movie Constipation?
You haven't?
That's because it hasn't come out yet.
I asked my doctor if it was normal for one of my nuts to be bigger than the other two.
For all the people with Covid-19, I just want to say... Stay positive.
Little Johnny and his dad were going to buy a horse.
Dad: Rubbing on the horse’s chest and butt.
Little Johnny: What are you doing?
Dad: Checking to see if the horse is healthy so I can buy it.
Little Johnny: Oh well, I think the mall man wants to buy mom.
What do you call a food fight that's been going on for years? A war of nutrition
(Tripple Pun)
What did the momma grape say to the pappa grape?
Raisin are kids is usually pretty fun, but some times they get sunburn and I have to take them to the doctor for dry skin.
What did the left butt cheek say to the right butt cheek? "Together we can stop this shit!"
