Me: Am actually happy right now.
Life: Lol one sec.
Has anyone walked in on their parents making love? I have.
Please comment! :)
At first, I didn't like Big Ben, but then I went there and the experience was un-BELL-ievable!
My grandfather has been through a lot in his time. When he was in the war, he survived a mustard gas attack. And later down the line, he survived being pepper sprayed by the police. He was certainly a real seasoned veteran.
I would like to tell you the name of a song I showed my friend who was LSD. I see a dreamer.
What's the difference between a girl eating Taco Bell and doing sex a few times? Nothing. Something always comes out.
"Nepal is a good place because it has been a great time for me."
Why can't the orphan play the game of life? They don't know what a family road trip is. 😆
The moment when she tells you: "I'm a virgin. Be gentle!" And you tell her, "Don't worry, I used to work with kids."
He: I am 60 and I have to slog 12 hours a day to make a living. Do you call it life?
She: I am 28 and still a virgin, do you call it life?
A 28-year-old medical student is auctioning off her virginity online.
For $300K, you can have the worst sex of your life.
Deja-poo.
The sense or feeling you have dealt with this crap in the past.
The first time I EVER HAD SEX I WAS ALL ALONE. You know why?
IT WAS DARK and I WAS ALL ALONE!
Me and my friend's life story on a daily basis.
I went to a stand up show with the person who made my life a joke.
My favorite joke: My life.
Have a great day today!
Why can a gay man give a better brojob to a heterosexual man than another heterosexual man?
Experience.
What kind of experience does a feminist have?
Being a bitch.
Ouch!
