Existence jokes

In 2013, it was reported that China has lost around 28,000 rivers; over half of what they thought existed. Some say climate change is the cause, others say it’s their harsh, economic expansion that’s unapologetic to the environment.

My theory is that those 28,000 rivers were sold to underground river-sex trafficking.

What do you call a girl with no arms and no legs?

Names.

While I was out shopping, I tripped in a store and a lady would not stop staring at me. For fun, I said, "Sorry! It's been a while since I've possessed a body." She looked horrified.

Dads are like boomerangs... I hope!

Son: Dad, why is my name Experience? Dad: Son, Experience is the name we give our mistakes.

You won't eat a human, so why eat meat? Bold of you to presume I won't eat a person.

I moved all the Bibles to the fiction section because there is no God, as said Stephen Hawking in 2011, but in 2018, God said there was no Stephen Hawking.

What's life if you don't have one...

Who needs April Fool's when your life is a joke?

You have an entire life being an idiot, why not take a day off?

All my life I wanted to be somebody. I wanted to achieve something.

Now, after messing up my life at every possible chance, I finally realize that what I really want is to have been someone after following through with one thing.

If you're reading this, then your life means nothing...

Have a nice day! 🙂😊

Why are people disappointments? Because you are reading this.

Who is yourself, and why do people keep telling me to kill him?

The 3 life rules:

1.

2.

3.

Oh, there are no rules, because you have no life.

Anyone on this app is homeless and has no point in life. Well, I'm on this app 24/7, so do I have no point in life 24/7, or am I just weird and unwanted?

Me: Wanna hear a joke?

Person: Sure.

Me: Never mind, I was gonna say my life, but my life isn't a joke! Jokes have meaning.

Person: Dear God...

My sad ass life.

Person: Bro, you have a bad and stupid life.

Me: Yeah, it was all good till you were here!

Person: WTF!

Stephen Hawking said there is no god.

God said there is no Stephen Hawking.

What do you call a fly with no wings?

A walk.

Is it all right when there is nothing left?

Yo mama is so fat that Thanos had to snap his fingers twice to get her out of existence.