Easiness

Easiness Jokes

If this gets 10 comments 9 (i dont care about likes) i will write a four page easy and post it and its up too u guys what its about

How to improve my beloved Penchester United in 5 easy steps:

1. Sell Casemeiro 🤑 2. Sell Pernandes 🤑 3. Sell Bencho 🤑 4. Sell Trashford 🤑 5. Terminate penaldo 🤑 6. Make Mctominay extend his deal 📝

These came down deep from my heart don’t let me down again, please.

A man walks into a bar and sees a jar full of money and he asks the bartender what's up with that jar of money bartender says you gotta do 3 task he takes the shot of Jack and the customer says what are the tasks he says the 1st one is but the 1st 1 is I got about a 12' gator in the back that's got a bad tooth and you gotta pull it he says all right what's the 2nd 1 he said I got a big old girl upstairs that aint had no loving in a long time you gotta make her smile he takes another shot of Jack he said all right what's the 3rd 1 he said you see that horse outside you gotta make him laugh and cry Guy goes upstairs goes out back comes out to the front comes back in the other customer said give him the jar The guy says I took care of that lady's tooth and I made that alligator smile well how'd you make the horse laugh he said easy i told him I had a bigger deck then him bartender says how did you make him cry he said easy I showed him

A man was shaving in the bathroom when all of a sudden Bubba, the boy he payed to mow his lawn comes in to take a piss. The man can't help but look over his shoulder and he is surprised at how well endowed he is, and he asks: "Bubba, whats your secret?" Bubba replies: "Well, every night before I get in bed with a woman I whack my dick on the bedpost three times. It works, and it sure impresses the girls!" The man was excited at this easy suggestion and decided to try it that very night, before he went to bed with his wife. So he got to bed and whacked his dick on the bedpost three times and the wife wakes up and says "Bubba, is that you?"

OK son", he says. It's as easy as counting to 5.

1. Pull down your pants. 2. Pull back your foreskin. 3. Pee in the toilet. 4. Put your foreskin back. 5. Pull up your pants.

From then on, every time the boy goes to the toilet, he counts from 1 to 5. One day, the father noticed his son was taking quite some time in the toilet. He went to check on him and overheard his son saying "2,4,2,4,2,4,2,4".

One day there was a frantic call at the fire department:

"Help me, help me! There is a cat meowing nearby. It is going to hurt me, it's going to kill me, can you help me, and send the fire squad right away?"

"Take it easy, cats don’t hurt us, just relax and wait until he leaves."

"You don’t understand it is going to bite me, it is going to kill me, it is going to be fatal!"

"Cats aren’t venomous or in any other way dangerous, now who is calling?"

"I’m Indy's parrot you twit! Now help me! please help, please help!"

I tried kidnapping a kid today and told him I was his dads friend and I would take him home, he just curled up into a ball and started crying, kidnapping must be easy.

I asked to borrow a book from the library, it was titled 'suicide in ten easy steps' the cunt just stood and said "cheeky bastard, you won't bring it back!"

Bad joke: Why is it easy to bully orphans, Because what are they going to do, tell there parents

There is this fish, and this fish thinks if that fly drops 6 inches , I’m gonna jump out the water and eat that fucking fish !

Then there is a bear , he thinks if that fly drops six inches , that fish jumps up - I’m gonna run out there and eat that fucking fish !

This huntsman also thinks to him self 🧐 if that fly drops six inches , fish jumps up , bear runs out eats the fish . I’m gonna shoot that fucking bear .

Unbelievably there is a tiny little brave mouse , who also thinks to him self 🧐 if that fly drops six inches , fish jumps , bear runs , huntsman shoots ,

He’s bound to drop that cheese sandwich in his back pocket !!!!

I’m gonna eat that fucking cheese sandwich!!

Meanwhile ..,

there’s This cat !!!’ He sees what’s going on - if they fly drops six inches -the fish =bear =huntsman =mouse eating the cheese sarnie....

Easy pickings ...

Anyway bang 💥 the fly drops six inches . Fish jumps up . Bear grabs the fish . Huntsman shoots the fucking bear ,

DROPS HIS CHEESE SARNIE !!

Cat runs after mouse trying to get the cheese sarnie

The cat Slips over him ( stacks it ) cat falls in the river ...

LONG STORY I KNOW BUT THE MORAL OF THE STORY IS .............

every time a fly drops six inches a pussy get wet )

WALLOP ... try remembering all that in A pub pissed . Xx

What's worse than depression & suicide? Easy : LIVING Everyday you wish you were dead but than reality hits u in the face that your still alive and has to suffer living Pretend or not pretend we have to decide everyday even if we don't pretend no onw will notice :) no one ever does :) Living is the problem to everything we get depression cuz of it and so much why can't we just die :) ?

How to be a hero. 1. Tie a noose in your front yard. 2. Find and capture a furry. 3. Hang that furry because they deserve it. It’s easy as 1-2-3!