Dot jokes
A burglar breaks into the home of a weapons engineer. He wants to steal some of his weapons from his strictly secured chamber. When he breaks in through the window to go into his weapons cellar, he realizes that the inventor is at home and heard him from upstairs.
The burglar shouts, "Hands up, there is no escape!" The engineer shouts, "What do you want from me?" The thief answers impatiently, "Well, what do you think? I know what you're hiding here. Get me entry to your armory, right away!" "Never in my life will I do that!" The burglar pulls out his pistol, "Either you let me in, or you go for it!"
"Well, I'll give up, I'll give you my guns. Please don't shoot me." The burglar grins gleefully, "Thank you." "I even have a gun here that I've been working on lately. You can have it." The burglar then thinks and grunts, "Okay, before you open up, you'll show me this first!"
The inventor says, "It's shooting plasma. You can test it on one of my practice goals that I've made while I'm unlocking," and points to a side room where various dummies with targets are set up. The burglar walks into the room with the targets, focuses on the red dot in the middle of the disc, and pushes off. But the gun does not fire plasma or at the target. Instead, the gun fires a bullet at the burglar. This causes him to bleed to the ground.
The engineer behind him began to laugh, "Hahaha! I knew you were falling for it! This is not a plasma gun at all; this is my latest invention, especially for burglars like you: the backward-shooting pistol."
Be careful, everybody, I have a red dot on my forehead, so I can record everybody!
How do you know someone from India is a good sniper?
They have a dot in the middle of the head.
I was in the corner shop to buy some lottery tickets, and the Indian woman was sporting a red dot on her forehead. I scratched it off and won a fucking Ford Focus!
If Kamala Harris is Indian, why doesn’t she have that dot on her head?
So she claims to be.
And the only black color I know is when you shut off the lights.
I wore a purple outfit to school, and some Indian kid called me Thanos, so I called him Vision and tried pulling the red dot off his head.
A guy is talking to an Indian therapist.
He had a red dot, and the American thought it was from a sniper rifle and tackled him and said, "I thought the red dot on your head was from a sniper rifle!"
Be careful what you say around Indians, the red dot means they're recording.
Why can't you tell an Indian a secret? Because the red dot means they're recording!
I just went to India and thought, "Why do they have so many sniper hitmen?" It turns out the red dot isn't a sniper laser.
I was in the corner shop and the Indian woman was sporting a red dot on her forehead. I scratched it off and won a fucking Ford Focus!
What's an Indian's favorite store?
Red Dot.
What's a little white dot on a priest's dick? A baby tooth.
What is an orphan's least favorite snack?
"Dots HOMESTYLE Pretzels!"
I have an announcement, Shadow the Hedgehog is a bitch ass motherfucker. He pissed on my fucking wife and he said he dick was this big and I said that's disgusting, so I'm making a callout post on my twitter dot com. Shadow, u got a small dick it looks like this walnut except way smaller.
When I was younger, I went to an Indian convenience store to pick up a lottery ticket. When the cashier handed me the ticket, she told me to "hold it properly." So I ripped the red dot right off of her forehead.
How much curry can an Indian eat? Until his red dot explodes.
How to become a monkey?
Put a red dot on your forehead.
What do you call 2 Indians on a dating website? Connect the dots.
Why do Indians have a red dot on their head?
Because they're recording.