Domestic situation jokes
Kid: Dad, where are you going?
Dad: To get milk.
TEN YEARS LATER
Kid's friend: Where's your dad?
Kid: He went to get milk but never came back.
"Mommy, mommy, where's my school dress... ewww!"
"Shut up and leave the bedroom."
Little Johnny sits on a chair. He notices he is sitting on something. Then he sees a plastic di**. He asks his mom, "What's that?" and Mom didn't know, so when his dad comes home from work, he sees him with the plastic di** and says, "Son, why you messing with my personal toy?"
Mommy, mommy, why do I keep running around in circles?
Shut up, or I'll nail your other foot to the floor!
It's sad how families can be torn apart from something as simple as wild dogs.
The weirdest thing happened yesterday. My dad came back from work... He’s a suicide bomber.
My mom told me it's not healthy to stay in my room all day... but the only places I'm allowed to go to are my room and downstairs.
Why do some couples make their status "single" after a small argument? Like, I don't put "orphan" after I get into an argument with my family.
My sister's boyfriend is mad at me because I fucked his girl.
My neighbor has been mad at his wife for sunbathing nude. I personally am on the fence.