Cognitive decline jokes
How can you tell Donald Trump is old and demented?
He can't distinguish between tanned people and cockroaches!
My doctor told me I had Alzheimer’s.
I said to him, “I don’t remember asking.”
I would've made a joke about Alzheimer's, too bad I forgot about it...
Q. What do a one-story house and an Alzheimer's victim have in common? A. Nothing going on upstairs.
I want to make a joke about old age, but I'm too senile to finish it.
Political correctness has gone too far! You have to say "cognitive decline" rather than "Alzheimer's ridden shitbag"!
What is the worst combination of illnesses?
Alzheimer’s and diarrhea. You’re running but can’t remember where.
Knock knock! Who's there? It's Dave! Dave who? Dave proceeds to break down crying at the realization that his grandmother's Alzheimers has progressed to the point where she no longer remembers him.
A man goes for his annual checkup. Afterward, he's sitting in the doctor's office, and the doctor comes in with the results of his tests. The doctor says, "I have some bad news; you have cancer and Alzheimer's." The man replies, "Well, at least I don't have cancer."
Patient: "I'm starting to forget things."
Doctor: "Since when have you had this condition?"
Patient: "What condition?"
Old man goes to the doctor.
The doctor says, "The test results are back, and I'm sad to say you have cancer and Alzheimer's."
The old man says, "Phew! At least it's not cancer!"